Just call me 'Gimpy'

Today I had to go down to the podiatric clinic here because I had an ingrown nail – yes this is gross. I usually never have such problems but due to the toe accidentally being stepped on – it made matters worse.

So I managed to get a same day appointment to have it looked at – after looking at it – the doctor determined he needed to cut part of the nail out – out-patient/in-office procedure. The ‘killer’ was not that – it was the needles he had to insert into my toe to ‘numb’ the area WTF??? OW! OW! OW! Imagine getting the same kind of needle that the dentist uses for oral surgery stuck into and then probing your toe – OW! OW! OW! Jesus! (sorry)...

After that the procedure went relatively well. Although I also pointed out a ‘bump’ I have on the back of the heel of that same foot and I was told it was a bone spur – which in and of itself is not serious – however the doctor told me not to even have it removed (unless it really starts to bother me), because of where it’s placed and if I DO have to have it removed, they will actually have to cut my Achilles tendon and that would mean an ENTIRE YEAR of rehab.

Geez...

When it rains it seems to pour on me for some reason...


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For those keeping score at home – or for those of you who did not know. I am one of the youngest people here to have ever been diagnosed with Glaucoma.

The story was pretty frightening…several years ago; I had gone in for a routine eye exam. The ophthalmologist did my ‘pressure’ test – she audibly gasped. She then grabbed my arm and literally dragged me out of my chair and took me over to the ‘Glaucoma’ guy. Apparently I had been walking around for about 2 years with 30-40 pressure in my eyes (normal is in the 12-15 range). I was going blind. Literally. I had lost the upper range of my vision. Basically as it was explained to me, it was as if I was wearing a baseball cap and I could not see above the ‘brim’ of the cap – all of that vision was gone – permanently.

I went home crying. I had to be put on drops immediately to bring down the pressure in both eyes. It worked in my left eye – not in my right eye. As time progressed he began putting me on more and more ‘caustic’ combinations of eye drops. The last straw was when the one eye drop literally caused a feeling like acid was being poured into my eye and I immediately had tears streaming down my face, it also burned down my nose and throat. I read the package and found out it was going to change my eye colour. Now, I have hazel eyes that are primarily green. *I* think they are pretty and I was born with them (well actually I was born with violet eyes and they changed colour) – I came into the world with this colour and I was going out of the world with this colour. I immediately made an appointment and read him the riot act. I told him I was done with the drops and he needed something better. ‘Better’ turned out to be actually cutting my eye; It was a scary procedure but it was also a cure.

The day of the surgery my ex (Tony’s dad) took me to the eye institute. I was the youngest person there – old people were asking me what I was doing there. I was approached by an anesthaesiologist who asked me if I wanted to ‘be sedated or wide awake’ when he stuck the needles in my eye…um yeah ok you sick S&M bastard what do YOU think?

No one explained the procedure to me other than to tell me they would be cutting a tiny vent into my eye in order to relieve the pressure. So I was consciously sedated and my eye was numbed. I was draped and could not see what was going on. The procedure took like 15 minutes. When it was done at the very end it DID feel like someone was putting needles in my eye. I said OUCH! And the doctors said “OK you’re done”. He left the room. The resident began undraping me and I asked him when he was going to take the stuff off my right eye cause I could not see. He laughed and said "C – your right eye is wide open". I literally had one of the scariest moments in my life – tremulously I asked if they had made me blind – he laughed even harder (yes this was all so very funny) and said no, it was due to the fact that they had to deaden the nerves in my eye. I was able to see completely by the next day.

I healed nicely, and the glaucoma in that eye is gone – except I now have blocked tear ducts (which may also require surgery and were caused from – get this- THE FUCKING EYE DROPS!!!). I also have a ‘droopy’ eye which will need cosmetic surgery. As it stands, I do need surgery on the left eye – not because the drops don’t work (they do) but because I don’t want to keep using the drops in the left eye. To say I am hesitant would be an understatement. I also need someone to take me and care for me/nurse me a little – when this is done. I don’t like that idea. But I have to get these things done soon and I am pretty sure the smart thing is to get the left eye done BEFORE I get the cosmetic surgery on the right eye. The moral of the story is to make sure you REALLY talk to your doctors and find out all the ins and outs of the procedures you 'need' because sometimes the cure is worse than the disease.