June: Summer's Song

This is a re-post from last year, June.

My, my, what a difference a year makes.

Last year at this time my relationship with my son was sort of in shambles. My 'love life' was non-existent. Getting my teeth drilled sans Novocaine was preferable to dating.

Things were not going well and I took a break from everything. From writing (on this blog), from dating (stick a fork in me - I was done), even in some ways, from my responsibilities as a parent. I was burnt out. Drained.

I was not looking to find 'love' per se. I was tired, spent, at cross-purposes with my very 'self' and, as you can see from this post below, a bit disillusioned with 'romance' in general.

So I took a blog vacation and decided to begin rediscovering myself, and, in the process, on June 24, 2006, I met the man of my dreams (and hopes).

I am never going back to that dark place/space again - no matter how this love turns out - I know I am strong, vital, and capable as a human being. I don't need another person to define who I am - having a person who compliments me, makes me the best Colette I can be - that's amazing - but not necessary. It's a gift, from God. I am blessed and I will continue to be thankful for all that I have in my life. I've learned a lot about myself over this past year and I can finally say I am happy that I've managed to come out complete and whole on the other side of the abyss.

Love and hope to you all.

C~

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Cloud Zero

...and it all comes crashing down...

But not without a little 'push'...

Why would I allow someone to take me anywhere that high?
When I know that the only way back is down...

Like the day I poured my heart onto the sand only to lose it in the roar of the wind - although it felt good to let the words slip off of my tongue...

Does attraction only work like a magnet pull - is that WHY we call it attraction - because it has to be mutual in order to function properly? Must be, otherwise, as someone said to me 'everyone would have been married to Paul McCartney in the 60s cause he was so cute'...

Not me, I'd have picked George...

And why do they call it 'Cloud 9'?

I am tired of my own heartsong...time to change the tune.