"My 99-cent dating experiment"
"My 99-cent dating experiment"
I actually wrote a letter to Mr. Miller because I wanted to share my own 'story' and to let him know that there are women out there who 'get it' and aren't 'gold diggers'. (Of coure they might not live in LA)....
********
Dear Mr. Miller:
I read with great amusement and quite a lot of sympathy your write up on dating 'on the cheap' in LA. Bravo to you for at least managing to pull that off. 'Tis a shame your lady friend did not appreciate your humor. We women can be somewhat humorless. Especially if we too have been through the ringer and divorced.
At any rate I thought I'd write to you and tell you I appreciate where you are coming from.
I was married to a loser who did indeed put me through the ringer. I was the major bread-winner in our duet and on top of that did all the house work - but I digress.
When I began dating again, I never got very far because it seemed to me that there was a one to four date, date 'rule' - in essence I was expected to sleep with a guy after he shelled out big bucks for dinner and a nice date. This left me numb and stunned. I was actually told by a girlfriend of mine 'Well C~, it's not like you're a virgin anymore and they know that' - to which I retorted 'So what? What happened to being a gentleman - is all that they are after is a roll in the hay?'
So what with the horrors and impersonal nature of the on-line dating debacle and the 'attitudes' I came across (not to mention the weirdos), I basically decided to stop dating and began looking into joining a monastery for the time when my son would go off to college (roughly about 2 years time...).
Not long after I 'gave up' on ever finding love again, my ex (with whom by this time I actually managed a somewhat amicable relationship) - asked me to give him a lift to a gathering/picnic to be held near our local zoo. I agreed since I had not been to the zoo in years. When I dropped him off, he asked me to stay, stating I might meet 'some interesting people'. Turns out I met the man that I am currently engaged to (and madly in love with), at this picnic (much to the chagrin of my ex-husband). Neither one of us spent a dime and the sparks just flew. I gave him my phone number and he broke another 'rule' by calling me the next morning. We talked all week to one another for hours on the phone and finally had our first 'real' date in another city, Columbus, Ohio - which lasted for 6 hours and cost him buying me lunch at an Ethiopian restaurant (not the most expensive place in town I assure you). That date was one of the best and most intimate experiences of my life. I think we both fell in love with one another that day - but of course we did 'play by the rules' and didn't tell each other for another couple of months. Since then, I am pretty sure he realizes I am not into him for his money (he's very successful) - in fact, as a Yoga teacher I am extremely bothered by 'money' period - but that's another story....
So my hat's off to you for your attempt to find sincerity and someone who wants you for YOU - not your wallet. I hope you find the love you deserve and need. I am certain that someday you will indeed find 'true' love and she will be a very lucky woman to have found a man who is substantive in a way that really matters.
All my best to you,
C~
I actually wrote a letter to Mr. Miller because I wanted to share my own 'story' and to let him know that there are women out there who 'get it' and aren't 'gold diggers'. (Of coure they might not live in LA)....
********
Dear Mr. Miller:
I read with great amusement and quite a lot of sympathy your write up on dating 'on the cheap' in LA. Bravo to you for at least managing to pull that off. 'Tis a shame your lady friend did not appreciate your humor. We women can be somewhat humorless. Especially if we too have been through the ringer and divorced.
At any rate I thought I'd write to you and tell you I appreciate where you are coming from.
I was married to a loser who did indeed put me through the ringer. I was the major bread-winner in our duet and on top of that did all the house work - but I digress.
When I began dating again, I never got very far because it seemed to me that there was a one to four date, date 'rule' - in essence I was expected to sleep with a guy after he shelled out big bucks for dinner and a nice date. This left me numb and stunned. I was actually told by a girlfriend of mine 'Well C~, it's not like you're a virgin anymore and they know that' - to which I retorted 'So what? What happened to being a gentleman - is all that they are after is a roll in the hay?'
So what with the horrors and impersonal nature of the on-line dating debacle and the 'attitudes' I came across (not to mention the weirdos), I basically decided to stop dating and began looking into joining a monastery for the time when my son would go off to college (roughly about 2 years time...).
Not long after I 'gave up' on ever finding love again, my ex (with whom by this time I actually managed a somewhat amicable relationship) - asked me to give him a lift to a gathering/picnic to be held near our local zoo. I agreed since I had not been to the zoo in years. When I dropped him off, he asked me to stay, stating I might meet 'some interesting people'. Turns out I met the man that I am currently engaged to (and madly in love with), at this picnic (much to the chagrin of my ex-husband). Neither one of us spent a dime and the sparks just flew. I gave him my phone number and he broke another 'rule' by calling me the next morning. We talked all week to one another for hours on the phone and finally had our first 'real' date in another city, Columbus, Ohio - which lasted for 6 hours and cost him buying me lunch at an Ethiopian restaurant (not the most expensive place in town I assure you). That date was one of the best and most intimate experiences of my life. I think we both fell in love with one another that day - but of course we did 'play by the rules' and didn't tell each other for another couple of months. Since then, I am pretty sure he realizes I am not into him for his money (he's very successful) - in fact, as a Yoga teacher I am extremely bothered by 'money' period - but that's another story....
So my hat's off to you for your attempt to find sincerity and someone who wants you for YOU - not your wallet. I hope you find the love you deserve and need. I am certain that someday you will indeed find 'true' love and she will be a very lucky woman to have found a man who is substantive in a way that really matters.
All my best to you,
C~
Labels: Dating, Love, Relationship
posted by Colette at 9:30 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home