Love among the ruins (a repost)

Looking back...and finding posts to share again...it is like a window into a different time - when I struggled to remember who I was.....

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Sometimes, I think relationships are like dreams and I am wandering in a nightmare right now...
Somewhere along the way I lost my joie de vivre, my raison d'etre, I seem to have misplaced me...
Somehow I am just sitting here, helpless, watching my house of cards come tumbling down around me like Athena's temple, crashing down, taking my life away...
Somewhere, somehow, someday I need to believe there will be love amongst these ruins, but
Somehow, I don't believe there will be a phoenix rising from these ashes.
Sometimes, I think I will be just an illusion of my former self, a facade - and if you look very closely you begin to see the cracks...
Somewhere along the way, when I gave my heart, I did not realise that you have to ask them not to take your soul too...
Sometimes, I just want to wake up from this horrible dream - and just be me again, even if it means being alone.

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"From where do I return,and on what wings, that I should accept, so slowly, humiliated and exiled,
to be myself" - Colette