Memories...like the corners of my mind...
This month is the anniversary of my blog...I have been writing and reflecting on life, love and everything in between for 5 whole years.
In that time period, I have fallen apart, regrouped, fell in love, gotten married, gone over to the place of my ancestors' births, become a new step-mom and had to rebuild my career....
I am wondering if this blog should continue at all - I know I have said this time and time again but 5 years is a long time to do something and I am not sure this forum is serving the purpose it used to serve.
Our lives are busy, full, to the point of having too much on our plates...we try to remember to do the important things and, perhaps we succeed but often we fall short, disappointing not just our loved ones but ourselves...
My life is very full indeed, and I feel I am on the verge of entering a new phase of that life; one that includes more service to the community and in my job. I feel that my life is coming around again and I am not sure other that doing the 'update thing' that I have a lot to write about. I have a man in my life whose talent is indisputable and perhaps between the two of us he will be published in print.
I still have storms raging inside of me - emotions that ebb and flow, fears, out-and-out terror at times, great joy, hope, faith, love, charity - all those things that go to make up a life...but it feels more private these days...less lending itself to shouting from the rooftops, drawing attention to myself - as if I've outgrown something - as if I should leave the playthings of childhood behind and strive for something more noble....
It's hard to be honest with yourself at times...
I have many people I want to thank: My namesake Colette, my other influences (Anais Nin, Margaret Atwood, Amy Tan, David Sedaris, and all my fav authors), But mainly, I wish to acknowledge my fellow bloggers (and I apologise if I have left you out - it's unintentional - I truly mean to thank everyone that has come along with me and watched my path unfold): my ex Mr. Helton (Dorkland), who, despite the pain you caused us both with your own pain (for which I am sure you have paid a high price), showed me this world, Linda (Auterrific), Tribe (hey darlin' where'd your blog go?), Salman (...see...blink...capture..remember, and ...whispers...), Jeff (Have Coffee Will Write), George Nemeth (NEO blog), Tish (Love and Hope, Sex and Dreams), Suzanne (Easy Bake Coven and all the women at Blog Sisters), Terry (I see Invisible People), Mac (Post Human Blues), The girls at Every Woman is a Goddess, and of course my personal friends and fellow writers/bloggers: Mr. C - Dark Clarity, Liam - Liam's Odd Musings, Ken (actual published author) - Spooked, My brother - who really needs to go back to writing, My step-brother, Don - Country Squire, and of course the man who has become my best friend, Erin (ohiorenaissance on live journal)...to all of you I owe a debt of gratitude, love and friendship - thank you all very much.
I don't know - I may just 'step back' here and regroup too - revamp things...try my hand at some actual writing - but perhaps like I when I gave up TV and never missed it - blogging just to blog about the day-to-day mundanery will also be a thing of the past...I am just hoping that there perhaps is more to blogging than just a 'twitter' - sorry did I just say that? (LOL) I mean who has time to read anymore anyway?
Je t'aime mes amis, A bientot, j'espere
Colette
Labels: Blogging, Endings, Introspection
5 Comments:
I would, of course, respect any decision you make in regard to your blog. But I'd be lying if I didn't say it would make me sad to see it go.
I have known you a LONG time, but have never felt closer to you than I have when reading the pages in this blog.
Every entry has been another step in the journey that is your life.
Perhaps instead of abandoning it, it is time to reinvent it?
Yes this blog was started by a woman in a great deal of pain, a woman who was watching her life fall apart, and needed this place to vent out her fears, and frustrations.
So now that your life has been reborn into joy and happiness, perhaps the blog needs an overhaul to reflect that.
What to you may be the boring minutae of life, to some of us is a celebration of YOU and the happiness you have found.
So give it some thought. A fresh coat of paint and rearrangement of furniture can do wonders for a room! (sorry that's the homo in me coming out)
I agree with Liam. Consider, perhaps, not closing the door on blogging altogether, but rather setting aside this chapter in your life and beginning again. You are not the same woman who started this blog 5 years ago, but you still have so much more to say.
Sometimes, blogging feels like its own curse. Ironically, my blog is about as old as yours. I've taken a break here and there and sometimes I debate taking a prolonged hiatus from it as well. Still, they're worth looking back and reflecting on the path taken... bumps and all.
Ultimately, whatever makes you happiest is what you should do. If writing in this blog takes the back burner to life, love, and other writings, so be it. C'est la vie, oui? I'm sure the both of you will be published elsewhere; I have faith in that!
Regardless of what happens to this little word oasis of yours, I'm sure the road ahead will be both enlightening and gratifying. We all make the choices we see as best and hope someday to reflect back with contentment...
"The woods are lovely, dark and deep,
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep."
Yes I feel you should not give up your blog, but just make it about your new life now. I have many of time just wanted to quit my blog all together, thinking that I am too boring or dont have alot to say. But even more now I do have alot to say and alot goes on in my life to always write about. Even now I have 2 blogs I do. But all in all you should not drop this blog but continue on, write about what you feel now and what new adventures this new life will bring to you and your family. I think the world of you and always will. your a real sweetheart and I am proud to know and glad to have you as a friend! Huggs!
We love you too, Colette. I would miss you if you weren't online but whatever you decide...
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