What WAS I thinking???
Last night I worked out to a Yoga video that I had not done in close to a year.
WTF?
Over the holiday I got kind of lax with my physicality I have had other *ahem* *blushes* ways that I’ve been staying in shape but it’s not like working out...well it is...um…er.. never mind.
So I ‘did’ this tape and while after 45 minutes I stopped, I felt sore but more tranquil; more in tune with me. That’s a good thing...
I’ve felt kind of off kilter lately. There’s been so much going on emotionally and mentally and I feel like I am at a sort of crossroads with certain things in my life. I am bored – I mean not really but there’s so much I want to do – and not unlike a biological clock that ticks for those 30-somethings who chose their careers over having kids – I feel like time is running down somehow...
Perhaps because it’s not really been winter – my typical ability to sink into a bit of dormancy is out of synch – if that makes any sense – yeah Ken: now IS the winter of my discontent...
*sighs*
I meant to ‘blog’ about this – but taking down the Christmas tree with my son did something to me too. We have an artificial tree that had seen better days – so I had told him it was on it’s last legs and that next year we’d need a new one. So when we were taking the tree down, after the ornaments had been packed away, he broke out black garbage bags and began stuffing the dismembered tree into the bags – it was like watching something being put in a body bag...it did not help that he then announced he was not going to ‘do this’ next year – meaning decorate a tree with me – I wanted to cry – instead I said: ‘Tony I thought you loved the decorations and the ornaments on the tree and doing this’. He said: ‘It’s a pain in the ass mom’.
Yeah OK. Sad. Really sad. There seems to be more at work here, but whatever, no sense in getting into it with him – it’s his issue to work out. But I felt forlorn and lost a bit.
So there you have it – emotional bankruptcy on some levels, cabin fever on others. At this point I just want spring to come so I can go back outside and play and breathe in the newness of beginnings again.
WTF?
Over the holiday I got kind of lax with my physicality I have had other *ahem* *blushes* ways that I’ve been staying in shape but it’s not like working out...well it is...um…er.. never mind.
So I ‘did’ this tape and while after 45 minutes I stopped, I felt sore but more tranquil; more in tune with me. That’s a good thing...
I’ve felt kind of off kilter lately. There’s been so much going on emotionally and mentally and I feel like I am at a sort of crossroads with certain things in my life. I am bored – I mean not really but there’s so much I want to do – and not unlike a biological clock that ticks for those 30-somethings who chose their careers over having kids – I feel like time is running down somehow...
Perhaps because it’s not really been winter – my typical ability to sink into a bit of dormancy is out of synch – if that makes any sense – yeah Ken: now IS the winter of my discontent...
*sighs*
I meant to ‘blog’ about this – but taking down the Christmas tree with my son did something to me too. We have an artificial tree that had seen better days – so I had told him it was on it’s last legs and that next year we’d need a new one. So when we were taking the tree down, after the ornaments had been packed away, he broke out black garbage bags and began stuffing the dismembered tree into the bags – it was like watching something being put in a body bag...it did not help that he then announced he was not going to ‘do this’ next year – meaning decorate a tree with me – I wanted to cry – instead I said: ‘Tony I thought you loved the decorations and the ornaments on the tree and doing this’. He said: ‘It’s a pain in the ass mom’.
Yeah OK. Sad. Really sad. There seems to be more at work here, but whatever, no sense in getting into it with him – it’s his issue to work out. But I felt forlorn and lost a bit.
So there you have it – emotional bankruptcy on some levels, cabin fever on others. At this point I just want spring to come so I can go back outside and play and breathe in the newness of beginnings again.
posted by Colette at 10:45 AM
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