Now...

Listening to:

Massive Attack: 'Angel' (shortly to be followed by 'Teardrop')

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Yeah I am here - at my love's while he is out gaming. I am suppose to be working on a lesson plan for tomorrow's Yoga class but I wanted to update and get some of the feelings of late out of my system first...

There's been so much upheaval lately in the form of trying to adjust to everything. I am technically/formally still at 'my place' - my son, my cats, and my stuff are all still there. (Informally I am at Erin's most of the time). Everything is going well at my 'home' (well except my cats miss me) - but it's hard dealing with living between two houses and they are also two totally different worlds, right now they seem to be colliding (at least in my heart they are). There is so much emotion tied to both ends that sometimes I just want to scream and run in whatever direction heads away from both places.

More than anything, I want to be married to Erin. Taking on the role of wife has never seemed so appealing. Taking on the role of 'step-mom' to his kids is a bit daunting - but I love them both and they bring a lot of joy along with the challenges.

I just want to have everything in place so that we can begin our new life together. I know change and effort are involved in making this happen and I am willing to do whatever it takes...I just know that there's a bitter-sweetness to these events...there is loss to go with the gain...there's adjustments to be made and compromises. I am trying my best to stay centered and aware as I step into my future. I am asking for guidance and strength as I enter this new phase of my life - God/dess willing we will all live in peace and harmony.