Beautiful Boys (another repost)
Remembering can be a slippery slope at times....
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There are dangerous places for me to go. One of them is Half-Price books. If you do not have one of these fine establishments in your town, I am sure you have discount bookstores. I have books (so many books) and since I had to move out of my previous home, many of them are still boxed up. I tried unpacking the books I thought I would need – my Yoga books, my ‘collections’ etc. Alarms should go off when I walk into a book or record store. Klaxons sounding out “SHE HAS TOO MANY BOOKS ALREADY!!!”
At any rate, I was in this particular bookstore and I was perusing the isle with the books on religion and philosophy. I noticed there was a person sitting on the floor in easy pose (Yoga – simple cross-legged pose) – holding two books in his hands. One of them happened to be a book on Meditation, which I already owned and which I felt was a great book on the subject (it was actually required reading for the Yoga teachers program I was in). I don’t usually talk to people in bookstores but lately I find myself just talking to people (a lot of times afterwards I think perhaps they view me as being crazy or rude – but what the hell). I said, “That one on meditation is great, it’s very helpful”. He looked up at me and suddenly I was looking into the face of an angel. He was a young man, probably in his mid-20s and his face was seriously beautiful. This is a real problem for me and I don’t know why. My ex looked like a beautiful angel too and so now I want to run screaming when I see men who look this way; almost effeminate, usually blonde hair, and piercing eyes.
He mentioned to me that he had read the book a long time ago. I think to myself perhaps he is not as young as he seems – then he informs me he read it when he was 14-years old. I was really impressed by this. (You’d have to know the book) – I kind of stammered (me being a stupid girl and all) “You read THAT book when you were 14?” (pause) “You must have been some 14-year old young man” – smiles are exchanged. He then asked me when I had read the book. I explained that I had to read it for a course of study as a Yoga teacher. This young man lit up like a Christmas tree. “Really” he said, he began to ask me about studying Yoga and I gave him what I thought was accurate information about various places in the area where he could go take classes. He also mentioned T’ai Chi so I gave him information about that too. There aren’t many places in our area to ‘study’ T’ai Chi that I am aware of…he was familiar with the place I mentioned. He had by now stood up because he was writing down the name of the place where I studied Yoga and I also gave him the website address. After doing this, he extended his hand to me and introduced himself “I am Matthew” he said – I took his hand (really bad idea here kids) – his grip was so strong, so certain, so intense (you know I used to think that stuff about handshakes was a load of crap – no it isn’t; gee can you tell what kind of a LOVER someone is going to be by their handshake? Hmmmmm *insert evil thoughts here*). I gave him my first name and we talked for a couple of brief seconds and then parted. I stayed in the bookstore for a while looking for things (it was depressing because I am so broke right now and there were several things that caught my eye).
This young man has not left my mind. I have silly ideas that somehow he will figure out a way to contact me (actually if you go to the website of the place where I studied Yoga you CAN get in touch with me)…but that’s just a simple fantasy and is more than likely not going to happen. Pipe dreams. I guess I just feel a bit strange. Strange because I felt an immediate connection – but I am sure it was only because in my soul, I hunger for a kindred spirit. I am even more certain that this young man (Adonis “Matthew”), is this way with every person he meets, which is really wonderful. I hope his life is full of the lovingkindness he seems to exude.
But it’s nice to think…to day-dream a little n’est ce pas?
*****************
There are dangerous places for me to go. One of them is Half-Price books. If you do not have one of these fine establishments in your town, I am sure you have discount bookstores. I have books (so many books) and since I had to move out of my previous home, many of them are still boxed up. I tried unpacking the books I thought I would need – my Yoga books, my ‘collections’ etc. Alarms should go off when I walk into a book or record store. Klaxons sounding out “SHE HAS TOO MANY BOOKS ALREADY!!!”
At any rate, I was in this particular bookstore and I was perusing the isle with the books on religion and philosophy. I noticed there was a person sitting on the floor in easy pose (Yoga – simple cross-legged pose) – holding two books in his hands. One of them happened to be a book on Meditation, which I already owned and which I felt was a great book on the subject (it was actually required reading for the Yoga teachers program I was in). I don’t usually talk to people in bookstores but lately I find myself just talking to people (a lot of times afterwards I think perhaps they view me as being crazy or rude – but what the hell). I said, “That one on meditation is great, it’s very helpful”. He looked up at me and suddenly I was looking into the face of an angel. He was a young man, probably in his mid-20s and his face was seriously beautiful. This is a real problem for me and I don’t know why. My ex looked like a beautiful angel too and so now I want to run screaming when I see men who look this way; almost effeminate, usually blonde hair, and piercing eyes.
He mentioned to me that he had read the book a long time ago. I think to myself perhaps he is not as young as he seems – then he informs me he read it when he was 14-years old. I was really impressed by this. (You’d have to know the book) – I kind of stammered (me being a stupid girl and all) “You read THAT book when you were 14?” (pause) “You must have been some 14-year old young man” – smiles are exchanged. He then asked me when I had read the book. I explained that I had to read it for a course of study as a Yoga teacher. This young man lit up like a Christmas tree. “Really” he said, he began to ask me about studying Yoga and I gave him what I thought was accurate information about various places in the area where he could go take classes. He also mentioned T’ai Chi so I gave him information about that too. There aren’t many places in our area to ‘study’ T’ai Chi that I am aware of…he was familiar with the place I mentioned. He had by now stood up because he was writing down the name of the place where I studied Yoga and I also gave him the website address. After doing this, he extended his hand to me and introduced himself “I am Matthew” he said – I took his hand (really bad idea here kids) – his grip was so strong, so certain, so intense (you know I used to think that stuff about handshakes was a load of crap – no it isn’t; gee can you tell what kind of a LOVER someone is going to be by their handshake? Hmmmmm *insert evil thoughts here*). I gave him my first name and we talked for a couple of brief seconds and then parted. I stayed in the bookstore for a while looking for things (it was depressing because I am so broke right now and there were several things that caught my eye).
This young man has not left my mind. I have silly ideas that somehow he will figure out a way to contact me (actually if you go to the website of the place where I studied Yoga you CAN get in touch with me)…but that’s just a simple fantasy and is more than likely not going to happen. Pipe dreams. I guess I just feel a bit strange. Strange because I felt an immediate connection – but I am sure it was only because in my soul, I hunger for a kindred spirit. I am even more certain that this young man (Adonis “Matthew”), is this way with every person he meets, which is really wonderful. I hope his life is full of the lovingkindness he seems to exude.
But it’s nice to think…to day-dream a little n’est ce pas?
posted by Colette at 9:13 AM
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