Friends & Lovers

I had a talk to day with a good friend of mine - she just so happens to be friends with both of us. My heart aches for this girl because she has been in a relationship with a wonderful man for about 10 years now - he's a really good guy too (I don't know how I keep missing the boat with the guys I end up hooking up with...) - at any rate, I guess she mentioned to him (again) that it's time to get married and they were suppose to go out and look at rings together for Valentine's day. Well I guess she practically had to drag him through this and her comment to him was "If you are going to look like I have asked you to pull a dead body from a river over doing this - then forget it..." (obviously I am paraphrasing here...) but my heart breaks for her. They seem to be a good couple and I know she loves him with all her heart and I know he loves her too - so what's the problem?

She should not have to beg him to marry her...but she should probably walk if that's the only way for her to live her life with him - she should not short change herself of her dreams either.

And then there is my Dreamer, (and oh how his name fits him in regard to this), who was practically begging me to get married and obviously doesn't have a clue as to how to BE married. I mean if you want to spend the rest of your life with someone else - why do you need to chase skirts, or be a womanizer to get your kicks?

I don't know which is worse; having someone who does not really want to marry you - or having someone who thinks he HAS to get married and then it turns out he's not mature enough, stable enough, or well enough (mentally) to be in a marriage. How sad for both of us. Does anybody have any Ben and Jerry's they want to share so we can sob into our respective pints of ice cream?