More adventures in dating
It's more like adventures in navigating the personals.
I have a couple of men that I am 'talking' to. One of them really piques my interest. He is very very intelligent (as a sidebar I actually got sent a little note a man from one dating site accusing me - that's right I said accusing me - of finding brainy people sexy...um ok - guilty as charged I suppose - thanks for noticing).
So anyhow this intelligent guy is funny and sort of cute. He is older. He is well established, he is an entreprenuer and he holds 2 doctorates. COOL! We have gone out on exactly one date...(brunch and a day at the Museum of Art).
He is also confusing the hell out of me!!! He writes to me, flirting with me. Really cute stuff. Then he writes to me that he should not be interested in me because I am separated and not yet divorced. OK that's fair. However I don't lie in my profile. I TELL people I am separated. I mean all along, this guy has been writing to me, calling me, sending me his writing and poetry - now this? So I write him back and I tell him that I totally understand his hesitation and I don't blame him in the least. I also say that I don't see why we can't remain at least friends. I mean we both emjoy each other's company, we both find each other interesting. (I must be missing something here.) I brought up my 'observation' about men and women not being able to be friends. He said that he does not think when you have sexual tension going on that it is possible to be just friends. He also told me he liked me (yahoo!) but that he would be foolish to pursue me until I sort things out (*pout*). Again I don't blame him. Part of me though feels like I am being punished because I am separated from my husband. I am being honest with people and telling them my situation (not EVERYTHING)...but the important things. I guess there are people out there more comfortable with lying than I am...I don't know what part of my profile they are not reading or understanding. Like the part where I say I am separated and where I want to be friends to start and go very slowly???? What part of that do they not get? Perhaps I am being unfair here. I think what is happening as I have said - is that they are simply at a different space/place in their dating evolution and looking for something different than I am right now. But why are they writing to me? Is it just a screw fest out there?
Again with the it's just not time yet. I think I should just pull my profiles and find a rocking chair and wear a black dress until the proper amount of time has passed - making me fair game again.
I have a couple of men that I am 'talking' to. One of them really piques my interest. He is very very intelligent (as a sidebar I actually got sent a little note a man from one dating site accusing me - that's right I said accusing me - of finding brainy people sexy...um ok - guilty as charged I suppose - thanks for noticing).
So anyhow this intelligent guy is funny and sort of cute. He is older. He is well established, he is an entreprenuer and he holds 2 doctorates. COOL! We have gone out on exactly one date...(brunch and a day at the Museum of Art).
He is also confusing the hell out of me!!! He writes to me, flirting with me. Really cute stuff. Then he writes to me that he should not be interested in me because I am separated and not yet divorced. OK that's fair. However I don't lie in my profile. I TELL people I am separated. I mean all along, this guy has been writing to me, calling me, sending me his writing and poetry - now this? So I write him back and I tell him that I totally understand his hesitation and I don't blame him in the least. I also say that I don't see why we can't remain at least friends. I mean we both emjoy each other's company, we both find each other interesting. (I must be missing something here.) I brought up my 'observation' about men and women not being able to be friends. He said that he does not think when you have sexual tension going on that it is possible to be just friends. He also told me he liked me (yahoo!) but that he would be foolish to pursue me until I sort things out (*pout*). Again I don't blame him. Part of me though feels like I am being punished because I am separated from my husband. I am being honest with people and telling them my situation (not EVERYTHING)...but the important things. I guess there are people out there more comfortable with lying than I am...I don't know what part of my profile they are not reading or understanding. Like the part where I say I am separated and where I want to be friends to start and go very slowly???? What part of that do they not get? Perhaps I am being unfair here. I think what is happening as I have said - is that they are simply at a different space/place in their dating evolution and looking for something different than I am right now. But why are they writing to me? Is it just a screw fest out there?
Again with the it's just not time yet. I think I should just pull my profiles and find a rocking chair and wear a black dress until the proper amount of time has passed - making me fair game again.
posted by Colette at 11:59 AM
1 Comments:
Hello dear,
Well that kinda sucks about the nice guy but I wouldn't give up so easily maybe he just needs time to think about it. Plus he may be afraid if he gets to attached you may go back to ur hubby and he's left alone and hurt. But at least u understand his reasoning most women would go off on him neways. I dunno people are funny creatures really, very unpredictable. But nonetheless ur a great person keep trying! Take care! Love~ Heather
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