I AM SPICY

(indeed....stolen from lots of people with too much time on their hands obviously...)

Your Score: Spice Melange

You scored 100% intoxication, 75% hotness, 100% complexity, and 75% craziness!

You are Spice.

You're not from around here, are you? You're extremely valuable. While you resemble mundane cinnamon, you are much more interesting. People fight wars over you, but your giant worms protect you.

You enlighten people; make them aware, prescient, even clairvoyant. Your pure essence can reveal people's true selves, if they survive their encounter with the real you. You're addictive, dangerous, seductive, and above all else, necessary for space travel.

Link: The Which Spice Are You Test written by jodiesattva on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test

Wie geht's?

Yeah...what's been happening....

Well....

The last movie I saw with my love was 'La Vie en Rose' about the life story of Edith Piaf...it was in a word annoying to me...sad, disjointed - not enjoyable - I love her music though. Never realised she threw so many tantrums.

I'd say rent it and if you are into the art snobbery crap do so...otherwise skip it...

Oh and I'd like to know why she looks so good in the movie poster and never looked that good 'on screen' - whatever...



On the job front...in a word fini....I am looking for work...and I will be 'blogging' about all of this but not now....

I am depressed and frightened - but the fear makes me feel alive and it's better than all the bullshit that was happening in the office.

On the wedding front....

We have changed our 'venue' the people at Punderson kind of bungled things a bit - I'd love to have my wedding there it would have been 'picture perfect' but this isn't a photo op - it's one of the most important days of my life and instead we have been blessed to have it at the church hall which will be easier for everyone involved and where we originally wanted to be. This is going to make things more intimate and it will allow us to have everyone come over afterwards for cake and champagne/wine...

This idea makes me incredibly happy - and while there's a lot of stress right now - I am bound and determined that we are going to have a lovely wedding and as I spoke with Erin last night I realised that he is everything I have ever wanted because he knows as I do - it's not about the place, the cake, the dress, the flowers...it's about our love and having a ceremony to reflect the sacredness that makes this love so very special (helmet and short bus and all *grins*)

Quotes...

"I do not want people to be agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them."
- Jane Austen


(I can SO identify with this one...)

Sometimes...

My heart is just too full....

Lately what seems to have taken up residence is sorrow - mainly due to stuff going on with my loved ones...

My dad's brother died - the last of the men on the Irish side of my family from that generation are gone now....you will be missed Uncle Jim.

Sometimes I know what caused my mom's heart to break....sometimes there's just too much for a heart to hold....

Yet...

I am more in love with Erin than I ever thought possible....

More later...kids....if you only knew.

Love to all.

Colette

An Englishman in Paris

An Englishman in Paris

I 'stumbled' across this one while my blog was in 'hiding'....great blog - that's why it's blog of the week.

Cheers

Colette

University of Delaware Requires Students to Undergo Ideological Reeducation

(Just playing 'catch up' with all the stuff form C2 lately - thanks darlin')

Quote for Today

The belief in a supernatural source of evil is not necessary; men alone are quite capable of every wickedness.
- Joseph Conrad

The wheel turns...

Time marches on, changes come, and, sometimes life just hangs in the balance.

Tonight I am going to be without my love by my side in our bed for the second night in a row...he finally gets home tomorrow....I've missed him.

I have a headache - it's been a rough couple of days - beginning at the end of last week with the fiasco that has seemingly turned into my wedding plans...more on this later - I want to give the idiots a chance to right things before I publicly vent.

While Erin's been out of town I am for all intents and purposes 'watching the kids'. That in and of itself is not so difficult - they are amazing children and very well behaved. Their schedule unfortunately, is not my schedule so they've had to get up earlier than usual which was kind of tough for all of us this morning.....but I am hoping tomorrow they do better.....

I also had to teach tonight which kind of threw a wrench into their mom's plans as she had to pick them up, but, luckily, she and I seemed to work it out - I am sure she was not totally thrilled but it could not be helped and we have a lifetime of this kind of crap ahead of us....so we'd better try and be as nice to one another as possible mainly for the sake of the kids....

Last night my dreams were wild, noisy (yes it was weird), disjointed, bordering on somewhat bizarre (for me at least), very unlike my own usual dreams...

So... I am wondering if my love left his dreaming cap behind along with the lovely note I found waiting for me on my pillow before I turned in for the night.

I long to find myself in his arms again....and tomorrow (although it will be late night when he finally gets home) can't seem to get here soon enough.

..and a very special birthday....

(This re-post is for my beautiful daughter (whose birthday is November 13th) - I love you with all my heart - Happy Birthday!)


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For a 'Sea Star'

My lovely daughter was born 24 years ago today at 5:29 PM in Houston, TX.

Happy Birthday Marissa!

In Greek your name translates to ‘Sea Star’ or ‘Star of the Sea’. That is not why I picked that name. You will laugh if you ever read this – but I picked your name when I was 4 months along with you – I was watching the movie ‘Barry Lyndon’ and the actress Marissa Berenson caught my eye – she was lovely and I fell in love with her name. I then looked up the meaning – and since one of my favourite places to be was in Galveston on the Gulf of Mexico, so I thought the name was fitting.

Having you was the culmination of many months of tribulations. You did not come into this world easily (48 hours of DRY labour). I won’t go into all the gory details, nor will I write about all the tribulations experienced during my time of carrying you in my womb.

I will tell you that from the minute I knew you were inside of me/part of me that I fought for you – that I wanted you. I will tell you that you were long and gawky and you grew into a beautiful baby and a beautiful child. You were the apple of everyone’s eye. You were sweet and mischievous at the same time; Innocent yet knowing; Stubborn as a mule yet kind and loving.

I know you and I have had our moments. I know I worry about you and dwell on where you are in your life but deep down, like my mother knew of me, and her mother probably knew of her, I also KNOW you will survive – you are too scrappy and strong-willed to do anything else.

An anniversary...

(This month - actually the week of Thanksgiving - will mark the anniversary of when I began this blog...it's been through some upheaval and changes and I am going to re-post the most poingnant (well in my humble opinion) post form that first turbulent month - the month that simultaneously witnesed the end of a unhealthy relationship/marriage and heralded the return/birth of my inner voice - Thanksgiving was also when I was divorced and this Thanksgiving will mark the secon year I have celebrated with my love and when (I believe or so I've been told) he was contemplating asking me to marry him...)

********

Leaving my home

I have stepped outside to bring boxes holding my belongings to my car. I wish I could stuff my heart into one of the boxes and just leave it for a while...I am heavy, sad, tired and frightened.

I can smell cookies baking - they smell like anise and it takes me back to my childhood for a moment and memories of my mother...

Her husband (my father) cheated on her - how did she deal with all of this I wonder? I remember her devastation and her sadness - I remember her crying herself to sleep at night, missing my dad. I ache to have her hold me and stroke my hair the way she used to and tell me it will all be ok.

I put my boxes in my car and go into the house to pack up the rest of my life

Happy Belated Samhain

Happy belated Halloween everyone....here's hoping you had more treats than tricks (unless of course you are into that sort of thing.)

I got to of course participate in the holiday with Erin this year. The kids went off with their friends and Erin and I passed out candy. I got to wear the costume he made for me this past summer - it is beautiful...

It was very windy and getting kind of chilly towards the end of the evening...I was still sitting outside. Erin had very kindly brought out a blanket to snuggle with and some food and wine. Erin had gone back into the house to answer the phone. Suddenly, a kid wearing a skeleton costume came running up the walk.

I handed him candy and he handed me a rock saying: 'Please give this to the next kid you see - he will be really happy' A bit confused I agreed. Sure enough a young boy in a nondescript costume came up next, a forlorn look on his face. he said: 'My cousin got a rock tonight and all I keep getting is candy'. Smiling I held up the rock and said: 'Here you go honey' - I also gave him a piece of candy. He lit up like a christmas tree and ran down the driveway calling 'I got a rock! I FINALLY got a rock!' - I was laughing so hard I was crying. I heard his mom tell him after they left the next house that she was pretty sure he'd only get one rock a night.

There must have been someone on the street passing out rocks a la 'It's the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown!'. What a riot!

********

So that's the update for the nonce kids. I hope all is well in your universe.

God/dess bless.

And while I am at it

To a certain asshole out there by the name of Ken Y.

It's November 2. I am STILL WITH ERIN. STILL madly in love - in fact after this week and the past couple of days even more so.

I think you owe us an apology. But I won't hold my breath waiting....I'd at least like to see you eat a great big bowl of your own prophecies. You sir, are a fool.

Have a great life...we plan on it ourselves.