Ooh La La

...and then some.

(*happy sighs*)

I am so very madly in love.

Still.

Today on my desk calendar were the wedding traditions for brides: Something old, new, borrowed, and blue....

I need the borrowed thingy.

Tonight I am going out with some girls to shop, eat/drink and have fun.

Next week is CRAZY...ending with my wedding to the sexiest guy on earth. Joy, excitement and yes still jittery. I can't wait.

I love you Ooh La La - and I always will.

You know...

In thinking about things – especially Ken Y’s propensity towards being a total asshole – I have to laugh.

You’d think by now people who were jealous, obsessed etc. would have found themselves a life (hell even my former ex has found his life again). But no, people like this seem to thrive on making not just their own lives miserable but on trying to make others miserable as well. Pitiable, but what can you say – it is what it is…

I would have once said this was surprising behaviour but no longer. I guess I always thought Mr. Younos was smarter – but that was a mask/myth whatever. Despite his pitiful attempts at trying to cause problems, wish me/my love ill – I hope that one day he find happiness – for we all deserve happiness in our lives. Perhaps one day a love will come into his life (love of another, love of self, love of something greater than him) and it will soften him, help him. Unless of course instead the only thing he ends up facing is a reckoning...as we all do at times.

At any rate nothing (and no one) is going to keep me from being happy, from loving Erin, my life, from writing, from being me.

'Just get me to the church on time...'

There’s so much I want to say. For once in my life, words seem to fail me.

I am jittery, nervous – ‘Cat on a Hot Tin Roof’ comes to mind – although without the Elizabeth Taylor gorgeous bitchiness – but a bit of bitchiness would serve me well right now – and I am sure if you asked him, Erin might say I am being a bit bitchy….

I have a lot of little things to get done. There have been some emotional upheavals. I’d like to vent and I’ve been sort of asked to…

I will vent about one cruelty and be done with it…

This weekend, I was speaking with my ex (my son’s father) about getting married in general (because of the logistics involving my son and other reasons) – he managed to blurt out I would be divorced in 2 years time (I of course told him he was full of shit) – I had a Ken Y~ (BTW go to hell Mr Y~) moment. He was being negative, and cruel, for no other reason than to be so – petty jealousy….but why? I am not going to deny that there may be residue of feeling still lingering – not on both sides of this divorced fence (well, not mine anyway)….but perhaps on his end and I am not trying to sound like I am all that and a bag of chips. But he has always been a bit vindictive…so be it. I called Erin on my way back home and I was crying so hard I had to get off the phone…I know I upset Erin…

Why do people do such things? Even if you do think that of one of your friends, exes, acquaintances, family members – unless they ask you shouldn’t you just shut the fuck up? Why are people so willing to visit their negativity on others? Why are people so mean and cruel?

As far as venting about the wedding – I just want things to be done so I can get on with the sacredness of the ceremony, my honeymoon, and loving Erin.

The reasons why I love this man have been documented over and over in this forum…they are too many to mention here again. As innumerable as the stars in the heavens….I will list off two…

Up until yesterday, when my daughter gave birth to her 5th child safely, I had a knot in my stomach – not only did he know that he had a knot in his stomach too – we are so very empathic with each other that it actually scares me at times and assures me that metaphysical powers DO indeed exist in humans.

He counted all the favors for the tables to be sure we have enough….

I am going to let that last on sink in for a moment…..

To my darling daughter – congrats Rissa I love you with all my heart. To my new grandson – welcome to the world little one.

To my family – thank you for all of your love and support.

To Liam, Ken and Chris – my favourite metaphysical ghost hunters the same to all of you.

To those of you out here in blogdom who have been reading and commenting or commenting off line to me – thank you for all of your kindnesses.

To the love of my life….

I will walk down the aisle to meet you in our sacred space and, in front of God, our family and our friends I will pledge my life to you, as well as my heart and mind and soul to our love. Always and forever, I love you Erin.

The 75 Skills Every Man Should Master

The 75 Skills Every Man Should Master

A couple of things....

1. Erin hates these (or at least I think he does or perhaps MSN - of that I am pretty sure) - however I thought some of these were interesting.
2. It's WAY too long of a list
3. Why should ONLY men master these skills - I believe a woman should know how to tie a knot and throw a punch too. Of course, some people might say a lady has no business being in a situation where she'd have to - but I think that's the point - if they don't expect you to be able to do it - throwing a punch might get you out of a scary situation one day.

(EDIT: Some of this list really rocks - like #40)

BBC NEWS | Africa | 'Witches' burnt to death in Kenya

BBC NEWS | Africa | Witches burnt to death in Kenya

You know...

I feel sick right now.

...to have and to hold...from this day forward..

Silda Spitzer Elle June 2008 - ELLE

...that is UNTIL....

Some articles from this month's Elle magazine caught my eye last night as I waited in the hair salon (see the link above and the one in the word 'article'). I am not usually one to be looking at 'glamour' zines mainly cause I don't even aspire to be that way....but these were both well written and thought provoking articles about love, marriage, fidelity and what happens 'after' everything well...happens.

So what DOES happen to us? Some things like THIS ARTICLE hits WAY too close to home.

What is is the kills the most 'mythic' faerie tale romance?

Lack of communication? One too many nights being ignored, neglected, feeling like you are the only one that doesn't matter as your significant other deals with everything else in their life that does? Being told one to many times 'not tonight dear'? The silent treatments, the unresolved fights, the not having enough time for yourself, your job, your family but then still being expected to be sexy and hot and a Victoria's Secret model?

Yeah...

Do I sound bitter? Perhaps. But this blog has been nothing if not a way for me to think (out loud and I apologise - that is, I guess if it bothers you...) - a way to be introspective.

As I get ready to be married again - I obviously have a lot on my mind, jitters, concerns, excitement the whole nien yards. I wonder about the pitfalls ahead and think about which one I will miss, not be paying attention too or simply willingly abandon myself to...and which will he?

This blog has been a teacher for me, a sounding board, a bell of resonance. I am thinking seriously of just killing it because I am not sure I have much else to say and other than a very few close friends (maybe some family) who really pays attention? And this isn't a 'poor little me' jag - it's just the truth. Some days, I don't even know what my own truth is - and frankly, philosophically isn't that what life is? The quest for our truth.

So I hope you all fare well while I go off to meditate, contemplate and try to get my 'shit' together. I feel like disappearing for a while and then resurfacing when all the secret landmines, obvious warnng signs and all other manner of subterfuge have vanished...

As to the question of 'what does happen to the happily ever after' - perhaps I am neither qualified or ready to tackle that question or brave those answers.

Love to you all, as ever...

Colette

California Court Strikes Down Gay Marriage Ban : NPR

California Court Strikes Down Gay Marriage Ban : NPR

Yay!

MSN Dating and Personals

MSN Dating and Personals

(Now for the men - and this lame-assed dude thinks 96% of men feel this way - hmmm well that certainly explains a hell of a lot)

#1 Hiking - he doesn't want to go hiking - really????

#2 Opera - so he's not cultured eh? (dump him)

#3 Travel - um...we spell it r*o*m*a*n*t*i*c

#4 Clothes shopping - depends on the man (c'mon guys say it with me Victoria's Secret {*wink, wink, nudge, nudge*})

#5 Relationship workshops - let's be honest mostly all of us don't necessarily want to go to these and if you have to go at the beginning of your dating experience well then I'd say it's time to find a different date.

******

Ya know...

First off I am sick and tired of 'dating rules' and I am quite happy to be getting married because I can't imagine the extent of all the bullshit one has to keep straight these days in order TO date - refer to past blog posts about my wonderful dating career.

Let's offer up some alternative 'places' and test the mettle shall we:

#1 A strip joint - for either of the sexes...sure not for a first date but hey if there's going to be sex in your future, getting a little naughty and stripping (LOL pun intended) away some of the inhibitions isn't a bad idea is it? You may learn a thing or two....or,

#2 An adult store - reference back to alternative #1

#3 (This is dependent of course) A kid's birthday party - whether it's for his kids/your kids/nieces and nephews - might be a good way to see how they handle children (that is if that's important to you).

#4 Church - again this could be tricky and you may be an atheist to which there is not point then but if you are involved in a relationship and you want it to go somewhere you may want to explore your spiritual side.

#5 A Yoga class or an exercise class together - it's fun to sweat OUTSIDE of the sheets and no I am not saying this because I am a Yoga teacher - I think it's a way to have fun and learn about each other on different levels.

So there you go...some 'different' dating ideas to try out. Good luck and let me know how it turns out.

^_^

MSN Dating and Personals

MSN Dating and Personals

OK how pretentious...

#1 - I do enjoy going to a sports bar EVEN on a 1st date - it's just fun sometimes and if you know that the guy you are going out with is into sports so fucking what - don't you want him to be as equally into chick flicks?

#2 Theme parks - what the hell is the matter with roller coasters?

#3 Chain restaurants - I have had some of the most romantic times at one of those - OK so not if you are trying to impress but sometimes again...could be fun

#4 Gross out comedies - See #1 about chick flicks

#5 Paintball - or even laser tag...perhaps you are just too feminine for your own good?

#6 Meeting your mother - OK to some extent I will give them this on the first couple of dates - but it's nice to see a guy who is able to hang out with his mother.

A Templeton Conversation: Does science make belief in God obsolete?

A Templeton Conversation: Does science make belief in God obsolete?


Well????

Thoughts, answers? C'mon people speak up!

Belated...

...birthday wishes.

This past weekend was my love's birthday (and, apparently unbeknown to me, MY birthday as well LOL). I didn't write because I was busy enjoying him and of course still helping to nurse him as he get over his being sick.

My darling Erin - I hope your birthday was wonderful and filled with everything you wanted - I hope for many more birthdays to share together with you. I love you. God/dess bless and keep you.

Always,
C~

Springing, springing, sprung...

This year for the first time in many, spring has actually lasted. There’s been no winter-into-summer crap. Spring has actually felt like spring. Not quite winter – definitely not summer. There’s been a slowness to it, an actually timeliness to the process. I got to pay attention more, perhaps, with the wedding right around the corner maybe I am just hypersensitive.

So this morning as I drove into work I noticed all the tress and flowering shrubs etc. are in full bloom. The air smells of warming earth and freshness. It’s wonderful and all I want to do is go into the woods or walk in the park. Unfortunately, Erin has been down with illness and the ‘awakening’ just does not seem as sweet...hopefully though, soon, he will be back to his normal self and we can share these spring-time moments together.

Pharyngula

Pharyngula

Go here now (you want to...no, you really do) - it's the 'Blog of the Week' on DOCG

Button, button, who's got the button

(just some buttons to make you think...)

In sickness and in health

I am here writing whilst my love is upstairs sleeping cause he is not feeling well.

I adore Erin - we have grown closer over the past couple of days - and I have been thoroughly enjoying our life together. For instance, we went to the West-side Market and had and blast, came home and made love (and it was wonderful as it always is), and then we went shopping together. Nice - it was just so nice to be with Erin and well...live our life together. Even the 'ordinary' and mundane tasks become special because I get to be with Erin.



Through love, life, troubles and joys I want to be with him.

The other night we watched 'Blood Diamond'



...an excellent though brutal movie about the 'diamond wars' - I don't like violence we already know this - but in the context of this story it's essential - perhaps it may make you sit up and pay attention - or perhaps you may feel a bit hopeless (I am sort of in this stage) - insomuch as what can we possibly do to stop such senseless brutality and does our paying attention make a damn bit of difference when the powers that be and the 'monied' in the world don't give a flying fuck - I have to hope against hope that what we do DOES make a difference, otherwise what's the point of trying to live a self-examined, purposeful life?

Which in turn, again, leads me back full circle to my love with Erin, which helps lend even more meaning to my life; how we feel about each other, how we treat each other, the conversations we have, the convictions that we share, has me even more convinced that this is meant to be.

Quotes...

Typos are very important to all written form. It gives the reader something to look for so they aren't distracted by the total lack of content in your writing.
- Randy K. Milholland

(*gasps* - so when I have typos it's only indicative of my 'subpar' writing? Oh My...)

It only takes 20 years for a liberal to become a conservative without changing a single idea.
- Robert Anton Wilson

I always loved Robert Anton Wilson - he rocked.