Dobbs: President, Congress ignoring crises - May 31, 2006

CNN.com - Dobbs: President, Congress ignoring crises - May 31, 2006

you know...I don't agree with everything he says - but I agree with a lot of it...

Cordless jump-rope can help the clumsy - Yahoo! News

Cordless jump-rope can help the clumsy - Yahoo! News

The clumsy???? How about the lazy (which it mentions in this article) - better yet how about the delusional?

Nuts - people are nucking futs.

Petition filing could halt S. Dakota abortion ban

Petition filing could halt S. Dakota abortion ban

Let's hope the voice of the people will be heard.

Again, gentlemen (and those of you sniveling women out there who apparently have forgotten how to be cognizant of OTHER women), get your hands and your laws OFF of MY right to choose.

NPR : Independent Oilman Takes on Oil Giants

NPR : Independent Oilman Takes on Oil Giants

If you can, take a listen to this - this guy is claiming that the government is owed BILLIONS and BILLIONS (hundreds of billions of dollars) in royalties and that the gas companies are ripping the governemnt off (and by extension Joe Blow consumer too) - gee who's surprised by this?

At any rate - he has filed a lawsuit on BEHALF of good ole' Uncle Sam - but will be mired in litigation until the day he dies...but that's OK then his kids are going to take up the cause...

Commentary: Kicking the oil habit - May 30, 2006

Commentary: Kicking the oil habit

Via my wonderful sister-in-law (who should have her own blog!)

^_^

Let me know what you guys think of all of this - do you really/truly think we can impact what goes on with the big guys in Washington and the Oil barons??? Or do you just feel it's futile?

Memories...at the corners of my mind

This posting is a bit of a re-write from March of 2005 - but sometimes these memories continue to fuel other inspirations.

Whenever I listen to Roxy Music, I am reminded of my very first 'adult' affair/fling. It was with one of my former English teachers, Mike.

(NO! NOT while I was a student - however he probably would have had I pursued it...)

Back when I was about 19 years old, I had to move back home - go back to my father's house after a stint out in the world on my own. It was not a comfortable 'fit' but I had no where else, at the time, to go and I was able to somewhat keep my 'identity' my father being a wise man and letting me come and go as I pleased. At one point, during this time, there was a man who came back into my life - actually because he had run into my sister one day and asked after me, she in turn gave me his phone number and I of course rang him up. He was a former English teacher at my former high school. He knew me during school because at one point, I took his science fiction class. He was an average teacher, but possessed a great mind. I did not know he was also an accomplished guitarist and very into music. I was astounded at his record collection it was literally hundreds and hundreds of albums. When he asked me if I wanted to hear some music, I almost felt it was a trick question because it was impossible to know just what he had in this massive collection and I had a feeling no matter what I asked to him to 'put on' he'd own it - so instead he put on some Roxy Music. I was also astounded the first time he pulled out his 12-string acoustic guitar and played a perfect rendition of Led Zeppelin's Over the Hills and Far Away.

The next day, we got together and went to the park to play frisbee with his 'dorky' friend who was still a teacher. Mike had left teaching (after being totally disillusioned by the whole farce) and had become an insurance claims adjuster. We played frisbee and I impressed both of them by my ability to throw the disc so far. After that we went our separate ways and I went back to Mike's house for a little while. He began to make romantic overtures towards me. Since I had always been attracted to this man (all the girls in our school were). I did not deny him or myself this pleasure. It was only a kiss but the kiss carried quite a bit of passion, it was electric.

He rolled us a joint and we began to talk of many things; all a seeming prelude to starting a 'relationship'. He asked me at one point if I had ever read any mythologies besides the Greek and Roman taught in school. I told him I had begun to 'study' a bit of the Celtic mythologies, and he seemed pleased. He then gave me a copy of the Welsh Mabinogion Tetralogy by Evangeline Walton, he told me to read it and let him know what I thought.

He then launched into an explanation of his 'situation',it seemed that he was living with his 'girlfriend' but that they were trying to sort out whether or not they should get married. He said they had both agreed to let each other 'date' so that they could be sure about things. Keep in mind this was the 70s, things like this did happen (things like this happen today as well but most people aren't up front about it) - I was young and I was a bit naieve but I did not feel I was being lied to or used. He even offered to let me talk to his girlfriend; I knew of her; she also attended our school and she graduated a year ahead of me. I had a feeling they had met back then. I remember her being a gorgeous strawberry-blonde girl. After our talk he got us each a glass of wine and we smoked a bit and I left.

I began reading the Welsh Mythology. I was very caught up in the 'story'. The books were well done, well researched and yet you felt like you were 'there' it was all quite thrilling really.

I agreed to see my old English teacher with an understanding. No strings attached. The MINUTE one of us felt like we were falling in love we had to end things. Secondly if he was going to 'see' me it had to be exclusive - I did not want to play 'sloppy thirds' as it were - I could understand him sleeping with the girl he was living with but I was not in the mood for fullfilling *his* 'Hugh Hefner' fantasy.

We began to date. Our first 'formal' date involved going to a place in Little Italy that no longer exists (Teresa's) - the food was exquisite as was the bottle of wine. By the time we got to his car he could barely keep his hands off of me - we got back to his place and nearly ripped eache other's clothes off. The love-making session that followed was incredible...

I began to read the part of the Mabinogion dealing with Rhiannon (the Goddess) and her human lover Pwyll, just as things began to really get intense between us sexually. Intense is an understatement - I explored with this man like I have never done before (or since). At one point in our lovemaking he called me Rhiannon. I actually felt like a Goddess-incarnate. I know it sounds 'crazy' but somehow it wasn't. I was flattered and frightened at the same time. Our following time together was even more intense, bordering on almost dangerous in the sense that we kept pushing the boundaries further and further with each other; he told me he was falling in love with me.

I called him the next day to say good-bye...

Several years ago, I saw my old teacher/lover in Hunan Restaurant on Coventry. (And yes the song that was playing in the back of my mind was Paul Simon's Still Crazy After All These Years. I had gone in to pick up food and he was waiting to be seated. We looked each other right in the eyes. He knew me but didn't acknowledge me at all, probably because his wife (the woman he did end up marrying was the woman he had been living with at the time),was sitting there. He had not changed – she had. No longer was she the stunning young woman I remembered. I kind of felt sad. I walked out of the restaurant after paying for my 'take out'.

I think about him now and think about the passion and the intense heat of sexual power and being Rhiannon and becoming Colette it seems only the names have changed. But there's no innocence involved. There's a wisdom born of life, of love, and of dancing near the fire.

A 'Wiccan' Soldier

TBO.com: AP United States

Many thanks to Mr. Hess (from the blog 'Have Coffee Will Write' for this one...)

I am a bit curious though - just exactly what IS the 'symbol' that atheists use on their headstones?

For your viewing pleasure....

Yes indeedy kids - these were viewed just today as a matter of fact
(yeah..it was one of THOSE days):

I am not a big fan of 'suspense films' unless we are talking the master of the genre Mr. Hitchcock but this one was surprisingly subtle and rather well done (plus Ralph {is it pronounced RALPH or RAIFE give me a break OK} Fiennes and Rachel Weisz - made the screen sizzle as eye candy (I've always been a sucker for his good looks and she was stunning as well - although I don't think her acting actually deserved an award - sorry))...



***********

Now, I know in the past - back when this came out, I panned it - and it is still rather trite (although a good date movie - LOL no pun intended) - however I still find Dermot yummy and again that scene where he is about to kiss Debra's character (but doesn't) is SOOOOO erotic - so it was kind of tolerable the second time around and the one line he used in the movie reminded me that I will probably never in my life meet a guy who is going to talk to me in this manner - the exact quote from Mr. Yummy was:

"I think I'd miss you even if we had never met"

Let's face it, guys simply don't talk like this - especially ones who LOOK like him -Why? Hmmm cause I would imagine they DON'T HAVE TO talk like that - women are probably beating a path to their penises or something (*laughs*) - at any rate it was cute in an incredibly 'fake this ain't ever going to happen to you' sort of way



***********

Last but not least - I merely caught a glimpse of this one today while flipping through 'network' TV, and I realised the impact this movie must have made on me at the time I saw it (I've related this before) - it scared the hell out of me. Today I was musing more about the performances that Mr. De Palma was able to obtain from Piper Laurie (brilliant and maniacal) while contrasting it against the sweet innocent and just as volatile-teen-aspect of Sissy Spacek. Amazing (campy but amazing nonetheless)...



*********
*yawn*

OK off to gaze at the stars before the Sandman takes over completely...care to join me?

"Switch on summer, from a slot machine"

I always adored that line....

And here it is summer - suddenly - amazingly almost as if by magic...

I feel drowsy, like a bumble bee..droning away.

Slightly annoyed - as though my 'temperament' is more fond of coolness than the oppressive heat; irritated because the 'silence' of the slumbering winter is being replaced by people living their lives...loudly, in full view, motorcycles roaring, lawn-mowers rumbling, children shrieking, making it almost hotter than it already seems...

It's why I like living by the lake at times like this - it's quieter, it's cooler - in fact I should be outside now on our deck sitting in the breeze-cooled darkness, contemplating the stars...

Sometimes...my writing surprises even me

I went back a ways, digging into my blog (which by the way I have to figure out how to print out so I can piece together some stuff to actually try and submit) - and I came across something I had written and it struck me as powerful - and perhaps it's nostalgia for a time when I felt 'wanted' or perhaps it really was impressive - I flatter myself I am sure...it all makes me want to sigh sometimes...but that's oh so cliche....

*****************

There's a fear in his voice a slight tremor......and you and I we confront that fear every friggin day and when we see each other there's a recognition of that in our eyes, an unflinching and we only look away when we have to - is that out of fear? Or just too close, too soon...

And I grow weary of men who think they can read me poetry and then lick me like a penny stamp. I want the rush of it all to come unbidden, unencumbered by thought processes that just drag us down to our human levels. I want my kisses to burn like the flaying of angels wings poised for flights down to the very depths of hell and I want all along to know it...

Like I know you...

Australian climber reported dead on Everest may be alive! News

Australian climber reported dead on Everest may be alive


...um...so does that mean that the people who left him for dead avoid all the bad karma?

Let's hope he IS still alive.

..and while we're on the subject

I've got 'caviar' taste on a 'beer' budget....

One of my favourite fragrances (actually I have several from this parfumerie) - alas they are all like $100 per oz.

THE (wish) LIST:

My now 'missing' books:

By Colette (this isn't as bad as I thought):
The Other Woman
The Tender Shoot

By Kate Chopin:
Portraits

By Josephine Hart:
Damage
Sin

By Carson McCullers:
The Ballad of the Sad Cafe

By Anais Nin (this is the most damage):
Diaries from 1931-1974
Delta of Venus
The Little Birds
House of INcest
Spy in the House of Love
Fire
Henry & June
Under a Glass Bell
The Novel of the Future
Winter of Artiface
Seduction of the Minotaur
The Four Chambered Heart
Ladders to Fire
Children of the Albatross
A Literate Passion (letters)


By Sylvia Plath:
The Bell Jar
Johnny Panic
The It Doesn't Matter Suit

By George Sand:
Marianne
The Intimate Journal

By Anne Sexton (again great loss here - almost everything I had - made worse by the fact she is one of my favourite poets):
A Biography
Self Portrait in Letters
To Bedlam and Partway Back
The Awful Rowing Towards God
Transformations

By Amy Tan (lucked out here she only got one but it was one of her best):
Joy Luck Club

Finally a great collection:
The Lifted Veil


As I rebuild the 'library' I am going to try to get as much as possible in hard bound *shrugs* - hopefully I can replace all of it....

Have Coffee Will Write : LITTLE KNOWN FACTS, 21-25…

Have Coffee Will Write - LITTLE KNOWN FACTS, 21-25…

Breaking one of the commandments by stealing from Mr. Hess (also Via Terry).

^_^

Now Listening to...

File under: New Indie (courtesy of Radio Indie Pop)

Arctic Monkeys - I really like these guys



A classic - and, considering the time this album was released it's always been cutting edge. It was a very sad day when we lost Freddie Mercury.

Hillary rips climbers who left dying man

Hillary rips climbers who left dying man


...yes Sir Hillary, I agree human life is way more precious than reaching the top of a mountain.

Yoga-ness

So tonight is my last night with the Thursday night ladies. This is the class that has the elderly woman with COPD on oxygen. I am sort of sad to see them go - happy in some ways to reclaim yet another night. When my Saturday class ends I'll be thrilled.

I told the Center for Integrative Medicine that I needed to take the summer off due to issues with my son and me simply needing a break (I've been teaching non-stop now since September PLUS worked my full-time job).

They informed me that they've found a Yoga teacher to replace me while I am gone and someone who will teach on the west-side when I get back into my routine again. It's one of the women I recommended and that thrills me to no end. She is wonderful, she is really a 'therapist' in the true sense of the word and even better, she's not a greedy, money-grubbing person. I will look forward to the break and to hopefully working with her upon my return.

OK off to try to relax a bit before class - listen to some music etc.

Later kids!

Breathing again...

So...

Today took the day off - gave my son a ride to school and therefore did not sleep in the way I *needed* to.

I did go pick up his tux, get groceries put in the house, came home to relax and he came in shortly afterwards. I guess he's been cutting out of school early - he claims all the kids are at this point and he only needs to be there for tests...I choose to believe him. I DO remember similar times at the end of my school years as a junior and senior....

My son will be going to see the counselor soon (as I mentioned, it's the one his pediatrician recommended). Yesterday, I got to have a phone conversation with this man who asked me to call him by his first name (big plus in my book). We hit it off instantly. He brought me back to earth and helped me quite a bit. He asked the 'right' questions and he did not come across as what I will call an anti-drug Nazi (now before certain people I know get their panties in a bunch let me explain); I KNOW my son and, despite what he decided to try HE IS A GOOD KID. I know him well enough to know that if I put him in a room with one of those by-the-book-all-or-nothing counselors he is going to shut down and not accomplish anything and what the hell would be the point of that? Instead I feel he is going to relate to this guy and this guy is going to be able to get through to him. And that's what he needs - he does not need preached to, he does not need to be threatened, and he does not need to be made to feel he's being cornered like a rat.

The simple truth is that Mr. C's daughter brought me to the realisation that he's going to 'experiment' and there won't be much that I can do about it - sure I can threaten, I can refuse to pay for his schooling etc., but I'd much rather be able to somehow get him to recognise what he's doing and come to terms with it and then find out it's not an answer to any of his problems.

Of course in the end the proof as they say is in the pudding...we shall see what happens. In the meantime, my son knows he is still going to get randomly tested, he knows that if we catch him doing the shit that landed him in this trouble in the first place he's going to go into a rehab program PERIOD.

I am for now going to relax just a little and put some faith in my son and in this gentleman to help him. At least it's a plan.

Life, the Universe & Everything.

Life, the Universe & Everything.

My personal pick for blog of the week...brilliant!

CNN: Atheist sues for proof of Jesus

...this is more of an 'update'.

Apparently the case was thrown out by the Italian judge but now another court has agreed to hear it...

hmmmm - now wouldn't it be interesting if he won...

You can also find a detailed article HERE that provides a link to Mr. Luigi Cascioli's book/pamphlet.

Interesting times we live in n'est ce pas?

Stunning

The world is a breath-taking, achingly beautiful place at times...these are pictures sent to me by various friends

Marketplace: Had any brain-altering stimulants today?

Marketplace: Had any brain-altering stimulants today?

So....

The problem isn't just with my son (well DUH!) - it would seem we are a society of addicts in one form or another...

Perhaps we should all get t-shirts printed that say:

'What's YOUR addiction?'

*smirk*

The World Books

The World Books

Yesterday, as I drove home, as usual I listened to 'The World' on NPR

This time I was particularly fascinated by the 'book' critique segment call The Myth Series

I am a fan of author Karen Armstrong and would be quite interested to read her take on mythos in general - but I am more interested in trying to replace the books I lost (I AM going to post a list of those - not a 'wish list' - just a wish) - BEFORE I can start buying new books. Karen Armstrong's book is:



However, when it comes to my all-time favourite author Margaret Atwood, I WILL be going out to find this (since it is missing from my collection). This book sounds wonderful and she is the queen of taking a classic mythos story and putting her own brand of 'twist' to it making it at once mesmerizing and chilling:



I need to get serious once again about my reading - I could use the diversions these days.

Owner goes to court to save attack cat

CNN.com - Owner goes to court to save attack cat

...because it was apparently a 'slow' news day for CNN.

White elephants...

Yesterday my son went to see his pediatrician – his dad accompanied him to the appointment. He and his father are increasing getting upset with me for being such a hard nose about this situation. I feel there is no other way to act. While I wish to keep the lines of communication open between my son and myself (his dad can go pound salt as far as I am concerned), I am NOT his friend – I am his mother – first and foremost. His dad is relaxed, passive-aggressive (gee just like when we were married) – and while he too does not wish to see Tony having drug ‘issues’ he is way more accepting (i.e. ‘Well it’s OK for him to do pot and booze but NOT anything else)…

The good thing that came of this was that he agreed to go to counseling. He is going to see someone the doctor recommended not the woman I am dealing with already (who strikes me as a bit of an alarmist – which makes my nerves worse)…I don’t necessarily have a problem with him seeing another person – especially if he can ‘talk’ and feel comfortable with that person….

Last night as I went to my bedroom to relax a bit I decided better of it and asked if my son wanted to watch a repeat episode of Bill Maher with me…we sat there, I listened to my son breathe – a bit laboured. I felt not tension, exactly, but just what was going on looming over us – and I knew if I kept my mouth shut it would just continue between us, growing bigger, becoming an albatross around the neck of our relationship…

I asked him how his appointment went. He shrugged a bit. I asked him where they ‘hit’ him up for blood. He showed me. I then did something weird – at least considering (well to me at least) – I thanked him for going and getting tested. I told him I loved him very much. We even talked a bit about how there might be something ‘physically’ the matter with him…

I am not sure if it helped or not or what he thought of it. He asked if he could go hang with some of his friends – I hesitated and told him OK – he just needed to be home at a decent hour and do take out the trash. I did go to bed before he came home – I AUTOMATICALLY woke up at 2AM to make sure he DID come home – how I did that I don’t know – perhaps when you sense your child is in danger you become Super Mom or something….

Today his test results came back. ALL NEGATIVE! Everything except for cannabis – which I knew would be in his system…now what????? Mr. C said barbiturates are out of the system in 3 days – but he took a lot of another Rx his doctor gave to him – and considering that was something like 54 pills in 3 weeks time you would have thought something would have remained….that is unless he did a detox – but they took his blood too!


AAAAARRRRRGGGGHHHHH!

So now I suppose it’s time to play cat and mouse and get him screened randomly and get him to talk to a counselor and hope against hope that he will not decide to keep using anything that’s going to cause him to become so addicted that I won’t know him anymore…

I know this all sounds melodramatic and soap-opera-ish to all of you – but to me this is my baby – he is precious to me and while I know I need to let go, there are just some drugs you don’t want your kid involved with…

This all sounds very ‘Prima Donna’ of me…I am not against the use of marijuana, I am not against the use of wine/beer or even a good stiff drink every once in a while – but I am against addiction – I think you need to be the one in control not the drug. And it’s not that I did not do my share of drugs (serious drugs) but I never stuck a needle in my arm, I never took downers like they were candy, and I never became an addict…I was able to walk away. I am just hoping my son is able to have the same strength when he needs it and does not end up like a lot of my friends (either dead or to this day addicted to some substance to help them cope with life).

Angry Alien Productions, Sase and Topsie

Angry Alien Productions, Sase and Topsie

OK I got this from one of the really fun people that I got to know via the wedding festivities I attended this weekend....

Funny, funny, bunny stuff...

Fat-Pie.com :: Animation and stuff by David Firth

Fat-Pie.com :: Animation and stuff by David Firth

...and yet despite everything going on, my son and I still are on speaking terms and he does still share things with me - including his fondness of all things artistically 'weird and disturbing' - which aptly describes this guy's 'cartoons' etc.

Wedding bell blues

Well, not really...

It WAS really lovely. I met some fantastic people that I plan on keeping in touch with (if at all possible, for the rest of my life, they were THAT cool and funny)...I was a guest at both the rehearsal dinner (Maggione's - great food!), and the reception (Moxie - also great food).

Even the ex was somewhat tolerable.

I drank wine and champagne - sadly, there was no dancing at their reception. Afterwards we all ended up in a hotel room - invited by the bride and groom to join them in their luxury suite - I personally would have been having incredible sex if it were MY wedding/honeymoon but that's just me (*laughs*). I was introduced to one of their favourite college pastimes: playing UNO while drunk - it was a hoot, an absolute riot. (Just as a side note - I did not get 'drunk' at all - but the others were pretty toasted - although I have to say no one seemed out of control at all).

To the new Mr. and Mrs. K - I wish you all the best; comfort when you face sorrow, and a happiness that knows no limit...

On a completely different (but still 'pissy') note...

My room-mate's cat, who is a tortoise shell, (and although I adore 'torties' they can be a bit 'mean'), and HATES my cats....

Well, she decided to express her displeasure by using the bottom shelf of one of my book cases as her personal piss depository....it soaked up into my books and I believe she actually 'sprayed' or marked some of the ones on the second shelf of the case as well because they too smelled and were stuck together (it is SO totally gross and I am so completely disgusted...ugh!).

She's destroyed literally at least $100 or more of MY books. Some of my Colette books, ALL of my Anais Nin books, ALL of my Anne Sexton books, Kate Chopin, Amy Tan, Carson McCullers, Sylvia Plath, and George Sand - as well as some of my women writers 'collections'.

The list is 2 pages long...some of them might even be out of print...I've already spent $50 so I have a feeling it's going to cost more like a couple of hundred to replace some of it and since I consider this to be a somewhat 'scholarly' collection these books mean a lot to me - I know they are just 'THINGS' but they were MY things dambit!

Yep...I need more life...keep it coming. I was probably extremely evil in my past life...and this is my comeuppance.

I've got half a mind to do what other people do on their blogs and put up a wish list (like a certain spoiled brat little miss 'stardust holiday') - so that people will buy me books...cause they either feel sorry for me or somehow admire me...how pathetic and incredibly rude to do such a thing...

No such chance here...

Sometimes life gives you lemonade and sometimes it gives you a cup of cat piss....

Geez....

" And the white knight is talking backwards..."

I am a crisis magnet...

..and I am going to lose my son...if I don't do something.

There's squirminess here - there's a sense of 'Gee C - we really feel bad, but we would really rather not know about your personal life' - this from co-workers.

Family and good friends are a bit better - but as Mr C. (the original) pointed out - who wants to listen to anyone else's problems (unless of course you are a barkeep and get paid to do this)....

My son is doing drugs, drugs that he has no business doing and he is so close to 18, that I only have so long to try to keep him from turning himself into an addict (that is unless it's already too late)...

There is something about us in our society that 'permits' kids to do this - we all think it's a 'rite of passage'. I mean I'd be lying if I told anyone I did not abuse drugs, alcohol and the like when I was in my late teens early 20s. But there is nothing like seeing your friends OD or die (which did happen in my case to quite a few of my friends) to change your mind fast about following in their footsteps; not to mention the fact that I KNEW my dad was an alcoholic and I KNEW if I wasn't careful I'd end up dead....

The problem is I can only say or do so much. Yes I can (and am very willing to) play the bitch/I'm your mother card - but then what? Then he runs away? Then he turns 18 and I can't do a friggin' thing anyway? It's delicate, it's hard and I haven't slept in like 4 days (I mean not a real good nights sleep). It's a chess game and I have to be very careful. My son 'talks' a good game - he sounds oh so bright...so knowing.

His dad is on board with me to help but it's like pulling teeth and his dad comes at it from a different way and my son connects better and responds better to his father than he does to me. But dad's view is 'well pot and drinking and occasional 'experimentation' are OK' - mine is you can't say to a kid 'Well this drug is OK but all others are off limits'.

I know he's going to go to parties, I know he is going to experiment. I've tried telling him that all it takes is ONE time to OD - I've tried warning him of all the dangers; I've tried being supportive but firm. I've let him know because of our familial history he is genetically predisposed to being a 'addict' - he feel he knows it 'all' though (I am apparently 'lame' when it comes to this shit accoridng to him), and he believes that being an addict is all 'in your head'; that it's not a 'disease' and you have to be pretty stupid to not recognise such things - he refuses to acknowledge that snorting opiates can lead to addiction incredibly fast, and his sense of bravado and 'I looked it up on the internet so I know what I am doing' astounds me and makes me so frightened and so crazy that I can't even begin to describe it coherently....

He's not yet hit bottom, he's not 'sick and tired of being sick and tired'. He will ultimately do what he wants to do and ultimately all I can do (other than play the 'I'm the parent, you're the minor and this is how it's going to be as long as you live under my roof' card - which I AM indeed playing) is pray...

Pray and do my damndest not to be emotionally weak and lose my cool in front of him. I need to keep a level head...because I only have 3 months until he turns 18...and Goddess help me I really need to play this chess game to win...

...but then in the end - it may very well end up with the 'Red Queen' offing his head...

So once again I'll ask those of you out there to send some good energy his way etc. and hope for the best...

Grey's Anatomy Season Finale

ABC.com: Grey's Anatomy



...OK let's just say that despite me only using this show as mind candy sometimes when I can't sleep on Sundays before I have to return to my own version of working in a similar 'field/place'...

I AM PISSED!!!

I didn't even catch the entire finale and I AM PISSED!

I found out today that they killed the guy (the really, really, really cute guy) who needed the heart that 'Izzie' was in love with (is this true? Anybody?)
And he was REALLY cute!

I AM PISSED at what they are putting on TV - mainly about the fact that she broke so many hospital and ethical rules it isn't even funny. I mean all of them would be toast.

I AM PISSED that now the American public sees a situation involving transplantation that seems really 'ugly' and, I am hoping and praying does not actually exist in the 'real' world (i.e. - doctors 'fighting' over organs like dogs fighting over pieces of meat)....

It's just all so wrong on so many levels...but then what do I expect?

There's a reason it's called the 'idiot box'...

But Goddess was he cute....

*sigh*

Now listening to....

...in keeping with the 'theme/feel' from a time before modern conveniences really managed to 'screw things up' - I find this group to be a breath of fresh air.

One of the songs off of this album really does go along with that 'Upstairs/Downstairs' essence a sort of 'I am rich and you are not and therefore you will do my bidding' air.

There is a song called We both go down together:

Here on these cliffs of Dover
So high you can't see over
And while your head is spinning
Hold tight, it's just beginning

You come from parents wanton
A childhood rough and rotten
I come from wealth and beauty
Untouched by work or duty

And oh, my love, my love
And oh, my love, my love
We both go down together

I found you, a tattooed tramp
A dirty daughter from the labour camp
I laid you down in the grass of a clearing
You wept but your soul was willing

And oh, my love, my love
And oh, my love, my love
We both go down together

And my parents will never consent to this love
But I hold your hand

Meet me on my vast veranda
My sweet, untouched Miranda
And while the seagulls are crying
We fall but our souls are flying

And oh, my love, my love
And oh, my love, my love
And oh, my love, oh my love
And oh, my love, my love
We both go down together

Artist: The Decemberists
Album: Picaresque
Year: 2005
Title: We Both Go Down Together

It just conjures up a time when a young woman could have been 'ravaged' by the young 'master' of a house and no one would have batted an eye. The Decemberists manage to somehow capture this and set it to music - brilliant.

***********



Oh yeah I was also listening to this while I worked on my 'syllabus' for my Yoga class - despite the fact that someone I know thinks David Crosby did not deserve his last liver transplant....regardless - I love the album.

"T.V. worth watching..

..is T.V. worth paying for"

To quote PBS and the TV shows on PBS are of course wonderful and worth watching.

MY favourites have to be all the different variations of their take on real "REALITY" T.V. and this would be their 'House" series of shows.

Of all of the I like the ones made in the UK the best. (1940s House and the Manor House)

1940s house is now on DVD and to me it's must own/must watch experience.




These are stills from 'The Manor Huse' which is like a reality version of that great icon of PBS programming 'Upstairs, Downstairs' link for 'The Manor House' can be found HERE .





The 'American' versions of these shows are
The Colonial House,



The Frontier House, and, most recently The Texas Ranch House - I really liked Colonial House - not so much the others - I have not really watched the new one.

I will say this - those of you hooked on 'reality' TV - should do a reality check and watch these shows - preferably with your kids.

Bears Eat Monkey in Front of Zoo Visitors

Bears Eat Monkey in Front of Zoo Visitors

*SMIRK*

I can just imagine the parents scrambling to drag their kids (some of whom I am sure were hypnotised) away from the violent scene...

While I don't know if this typically happens between this particular species of sloth bears and Barbary macaques, I think it's important for parents to teach their children the lesson that in the wild - animals KILL AND EAT each other ALL THE TIME....

The fact that we 'humans' cage them - hold them in captivity, for our own pleasure and entertainment is what should be 'horrifying' and unnatural.

Inside jokes...

Lament of a 'goth-chick' that wasn't

You know I 'notice' people...I am always sort of observing them - sometimes judging. They all seem to have a cetain 'look' or a 'gimmick' I hardly ever meet people who are truly not trying to 'fit in' somehow...

They have a 'feel' to them...

I've come to the conclusion that I would have been a 'goth-chick' had I known what one was...

After all, I had long auburn hair, past my waist, pale skin; I wore big crosses and school girl uniforms and I was reading Tarot cards and Anton LaVey, Crowley, listened to Black Sabbath and Led Zeppelin et al at a very young age - this would have landed me in big trouble had I not managed to get myself kicked out of Catholic School 2 years before at the age of 12. And I had the moody, sulking, aloof thing down to a fine art...

Shucks....apparently I missed out.

^_^

Eeyore (AGAIN)

or..

Riding the cotton donkey for eternity

...yeah so as I've made mention, I work with an 'old woman' (no offense to really old women) - she is a female version of Eeyore only much, much worse.

She hates life. It sort of rubs off at times and makes me really irritable. When she gets angry at work she grumbles. NO I mean ACTUALLY grumbles. A lot of us swear - which I admit is bad - I do a great impression of Popeye the Sailor Man but hey 'fuck' is such an all purpose word. And no, I don't use that word at work - unless my computer has totally crashed...

Not her though - when she gets *that* angry she says things like:

"Ishkabibble" or, 'Man-oh-manshevitz'

Ishkabibble???? WTF?

I feel like I am stuck in Bednobs and Broomsticks with a mean, ugly, crippled, Angela Lansbury - and it makes me crazy by the end of the work week.

I try (I really do) to be patient and kind and to help her with her computer (this woman who can't figure out how to use her mouse or how to close a 'window') - but sometimes I just want to scream at her and the word I have in mind is certainly NOT 'Ishkabibble'.

Tired but happy...

Did not sleep a wink last night....can't explain....

Had to get up and teach a class this morning.

Came home achy and tired. I am worried cause my shoulders and my neck and pectoral muscles hurt on one side pretty bad. I had to take 3 Ibuprofen and I don't like taking that shit cause I like my kidneys. Tried to go to bed, had to help my son's friend load up stuff cause he had a gig tonight. I finally got to take a nap after that. Now I am up and need to write.

I have so much to do - I have to put together a syllabus for my Yoga class at Tri-C - and I have a couple of posts to do...as well....

Need. To. Sleep.

*yawn*

Crooks and Liars

Crooks and Liars

(File under: A day late, dollar short - it's not that I didn't HEAR about this or didn't think Mr. Colbert was brilliant (and I am now considering sending him a marriage proposal) - it's that I just did not jump on the 'blogging bandwagon' as immediately as I should have)

^_^

Portable Fiasco - by Lagged2Death

Portable Fiasco - by Lagged2Death

My pick for blog of the week here on DOCG

YouTube - Evolution of Dance

YouTube - Evolution of Dance

This is hysterical...very good. I'd love to take this guy for a spin on a dance floor sometime...

(Via C2)

Eau de Stilton: cheesy perfume with a pong

Eau de Stilton: cheesy perfume with a pong

Eau??? More like ewwww

For those 'cheesy' enough to dare

^_^

Priest convicted of murdering nun on Easter eve

Priest convicted of murdering nun on Easter eve

There is a lot about this conviction that bothers me...and it should all of you.

And it's not so much that I think he didn't do it - it's that there was absolutely reasonable doubt in this case and I don't feel that the jury should have convicted him based on the evidence presented.

But then I fear a guilty man would have walked...it's a tough balancing act - it's why justice wears a blindfold...

"What is Love?"

(LOL – great now I have the song going through my head - was it the movie ‘A Night at the Roxbury’ that breathed new life into that one?)

It’s amazing to me all the convolutions/evolutions/permutations we go through as humans when it comes to this (I’ll call it a virus; because to me that’s what it seems like).

LOVE.

What would we do without it? Part of me thinks we may be a lot happier – part of me knows truthfully we would die without love in our lives – in some form.

What of love?

I remember reading the little tart’s writing where she wrote something like ‘They don’t let you love enough here’

WTF does that mean? Does it mean that one should be allowed to love without discrimination, hurting anyone that gets in the path of their supposed love. And how can it be called love if it harms others involved. Is it that their love because it’s so lustful, so hot, so flavour du jour, is the ONLY love that matters? What of love and loyalty to family; to someone that you took vows with? Does that love not compare somehow – is it diminished because the hubby can’t get it up for his wife any longer?

I used to think it was OK to love more than one person at a time – I still think it’s OK – heck I think it’s natural – but oh the heartache we set ourselves up for by doing that.
I’ve talked to people about this and tried reasoning it out somehow in my head and I’ve come to believe there is no reasoning with the heart – the heart wants what the heart wants, the hell with the head. We set ourselves up for this you know...

Like Mr. Hess remarked we should have ‘renewable/negotiable contracts’ between each other so that parties can enter arbitration yearly instead of being stuck in a loveless/sexless marriage (or is that just the latest pick up line guys are using these days?) ; I’ll get an e-mail msg ‘Hi C – would love to meet you – I am ‘stuck’ in a loveless/sexless marriage and my wife and I have a ‘don’t ask/don’t tell’ agreement – I’d LOVE to meet you’ or ‘My wife just doesn’t understand me’

Yeah ok buddy, I’ve got news for you – she doesn’t want to understand you – is that your excuse for cheating?

Is it any wonder I feel the way I do about this shit. I feel like I was born at the wrong time, that I am too romantic, old-fashioned, stuck in some mind set that won’t allow me to somehow let go.

Margaret Cho remarked in one of her live acts that she wanted a ‘Henna husband’.
I do too. Wouldn’t it be nice to just ‘wash that many right out of your hair’ when things get bad? But then what happens when they get under your skin? What happens when no matter what you do – they won’t go away – they haunt you – and does that really ever happen anymore? Do *I* have the ability to get under a man’s skin anymore? I kind of doubt it – and is that the ONLY thing I will be satisfied with – cause I want it all –otherwise why bother, I’ll just end up bored out of my skull...

*yawn*

They’re all so blatantly pedestrian and boring...no fire, no substance, no edginess, no willingness to just let it fly, it’s all about the ‘comfort zone’ or pretending to be anything but – yet in reality when faced with the danger, the possibility, the fear takes over and off they run screaming for their mothers, it’s absurd and ridiculous and I am tired of all of it completely.

They are threatened by my stances, by my anger, by my unwillingness to be anything other than what I am, they don’t hear me when I talk (or rant) – they think I am nagging, negative, complaining, bitchy or bitter – ah I see but when it’s a man it’s turned around somehow, and suddenly instead it’s viewed that they are aggressive (but in a good way), capable, able to get the job done, no nonsense etc. They want someone safe, not challenging, not intellectual, not confrontational, or aggressive (as a woman that is - cause that’s somehow that's a bad trait in the ‘weaker sex’), and certainly not someone who is going to ‘fight back’ – and perhaps I can’t really blame them – but, what’s absolutely hysterical to me is yet they don’t want it boring either….BE CREATIVE – but only in the confines of the bedroom….

Passion to me is something I wear on my sleeve – it’s here for the entire world to see a la this medium – my home here on the internet – it is here I come to whisper my secrets, my fears, where I rant and rave at society, the world in general…it’s where I expose myself, become self-deprecating, morose, bitter, sarcastic, sad, self-recriminating, it’s where I take a good look at myself and try to figure things out. It’s ME I am ME – how about that – strange having someone truly be themselves without apology isn’t it? It’s not meant to be fodder for anyone else – yet the entire world is fodder for me to write about...unfair huh? Too bad.

I have loves in my life. A lot of them are still ‘around’ they are wrong for me – I for them – some are actually a detriment to my health. Some are unrequited – I will never be with them because either I have some weird moral code or they are in love elsewhere. *laughs* it’s like the J. Geils band song ‘Love Stinks’ : “You love her, but she loves him And he loves somebody else, you just can't ever win…”

We drive ourselves crazy over something that began as a biological imperative and has now turned us into horny, lustful, dissatisfied, bored, complacent, irresponsible dullards. I don’t want to go back to the ‘way things were’– mainly cause I’ve no reason to bear children anymore – I LIKE ROMANCE, but I will say this for being ‘scientific’ and unflinchingly brutal about it – at least it was more honest and at least our feelings didn’t get so hurt.

In tribes it was (and for all I know still is) – acceptable for the chief to have his pick of women and for him to father many children with different women because the blood-lines, the best of the genetic make up were passed on and, since he was the ‘leader’ supposedly the bravest, the best/the crème de la crème, well that was all for the betterment of society. It somehow became not the thing to do and suddenly we sprouted 'morals' and needed a ‘God’ and thus became civilised - but really after all this time – and all I see on the Internet, on TV, in the movies - have we?

Affairs of the heart have gone on for time immemorial – they always will. Kings have gone to war, abdicated their thrones all for the love of a woman; possibly a woman that was forbidden. Is that really romance, or is that the folly of a fool? Empires crumbled, art was created, books, music all manner of tributes paid in the name of love – so what is it that keeps us going back for more after we feel like our heart has been torn to shreds and we are numb inside. Is it fear of loneliness? Is it because we figure we’ll finally ‘get it right’ this time?

Beats the hell out me – this is more a rambling, probably incoherent attempt at some half-assed introspection. I’ve said time and time again I’d like someone in my life – but maybe I’d just be better off getting a dog – cause I am just not up for, nor do I have the energy for, the games or the stomach or gumption to take on all that risk anymore….part of me is simply beginning to feel it just isn’t worth it at all. Romance was probably just a figment of my tattered imagination – something – perhaps an ad campaign, crafted long ago by a genius to keep all of us distracted…and like the faerie tale it is *poof* after a while it disappears like so many childhood memories, never to be recaptured.

To whom it may concern....

Didn't your parents ever tell you certain subjects are better left not discussed? (Like religion, politics, personal beliefs, morals etc.)

Guess not....

And..just because someone DOES bring something up on their personal website/space is no reason to throw down a gauntlet...unless that's what floats your boat...

Contra-Contraception - New York Times

Contra-Contraception - New York Times

Just in case you are not really upset enough about our reproductive rights as women being compromised - this give us a little background/history into the debate.

Courtesy Ms. G - soon to be Mrs. K -

NPR : The Wee Fairy Doors of Ann Arbor, Mich.

NPR : The Wee Fairy Doors of Ann Arbor, Mich.

Cute story....weird...but cute.

Dobbs to president: Do you take us for fools? - May 10, 2006

Dobbs to president: Do you take us for fools?

Er, *ahem*

I believe the answer to your question Mr. Dobbs, would be a resounding YES!

And, unfortunately, we are all willing to play the part so well...

Isn't it time to get really mad YET???

Curiosity kills...

From Mr. C2 (no relation whatsoever to *MY* C2)

^_^

Putin calls for stronger army - May 10, 2006

CNN.com - Putin calls for stronger army

Not that I am a big fan of Putin - but this is one hell of a quote:

"'Where is all this pathos about protecting human rights and democracy when it comes to the need to pursue their own interests?' said Putin, who also used a fairy-tale reference to criticize the aggressive U.S. course in global affairs.

'We are aware what is going on in the world,' he said. 'Comrade wolf knows whom to eat, it eats without listening and it's clearly not going to listen to anyone.'"

Bird Flu update

This is hysterically funny from my dear friend Mr. C - and only those of you who are really locals are going to get this....

******************

Bird flu hits Parma and Parma Heights:

Stones deny Richards suffered brain damage - May 10, 2006

CNN.com - Stones deny Richards suffered brain damage

LOL

...well not from the FALL per se...just from all the drugs he's fried his brain with in the past.

...and just because...

I like the way your sparkling earrings lay,
Against your skin, so brown
And i wanna sleep with youIn the desert tonight
With a billion stars all around
'cause i gotta peaceful easy feeling
And i know you won't let me down
'cause i'm already standing on the Ground

And i found out a long time ago
What a woman can do to your soul
Ah, but she can't take you anyway
You don't already know how to go
And i gotta peaceful, easy feeling
And i know you won't let me down
'cause i'm already standing on the ground

I get this feeling i may know you
As a lover and a friend
But this voice keeps whisperingIn my other ear,
tells meI may never see you again
'cause i get a peaceful, easy feeling
And i know you won't let me down
'cause i'm already standing on the ground
'cause i'm already standing...
On the ground


Artist: Eagles
Album: Eagles
Title: Peaceful Easy Feeling

'What you gonna do in those shoes?'

...or thong, or g-string...

Yes indeed kids things have taken a turn for the seedy here on DOCG.

Say it with me now...

SEX

There. Didn't that feel good?

You all know how things have been with me (and almost every other 'single' person or married person looking to cheat) and those 'dating sites'. Well I should not include married people looking to cheat because they actually would be able to probably find easy access to naughtiness on-line.

I had been a member of several sites; like 'Match.com' and 'True' well apparently one of the sites recently 'signed me up' unbeknownst to me for another site called 'Wealthymen.com'

STAY OFF THIS SITE!

Why? Cause most of the guys on there are not necessarily 'wealthy' and they all write in broken English - and you can smell a scam BIG TIME - I mean it's so blatant it isn't funny.

I actually had one of them get so angry when I pointed out how odd it was that MOST of the guys on the site seemed like foreigners and I was wondering if I should report the site that he THREATENED TO KILL ME AND MY KIDS! Now, my real name, my address, my e-mail etc isn't on this site...but still it was pretty scary - oh and by the way there is NO Admin to report it to - therefore I wrote all the girls in Ohio on the site warning them about this guy - you would not believe the responses I got back - one of them told me she was scammed for $5,000. Another suggested I report it to the FBI - what there's a division of the FBI that works on dating sites? Um OK. Perhaps, if I was stupid enough to lose money to one of those creeps...

You know the title of this post comes from the Eagle's song 'Those Shoes' which talks about the singles bar scene and how things were I am gathering during the nights of disco and drunken revelry a la 'Club 54' days...

My question is - I want to know why then and even now, we are so desperate. What is there to be desperate about? Sure, I am lonely. Sure I'd like to find a nice guy to date. But if it doesn't happen that does not mean I am going to sleep with just anyone. I don't do one night stands. Period. I have had exactly ONE one-night-stand in my life and it left me feeling so tainted and so dirty that I swore never again.

What's been happening with me on these sites is more about an experiment in social interaction/the psychology of the ritual mating dance, a voyeuristic romp through a bizarre, sexually charged atmosphere. And most days it leaves me cold.

For instance, I recently decided to check out 'Adult Friend Finder' I mean the term subtle never seems to cross anyone's mind there. I have never been e-mailed so many pictures of men's penises. Ugh! (Yeah OK go ahead and laugh I deserve it - what WAS I expecting anyways - OH and for those keeping scorecards or playing the home version of this game - my ex had a profile on there stating he was bisexual and single and of course it was from when we were married. BIG SURPRISE THERE.) I am at once reminded of the comment made by one of my heroes Bill Maher about how we rant and rave and scream in this country, complaining about how our privacy is being invaded and how our internet 'rights' are being compromised and yet we are more than willing to plaster pictures of our 'naughty bits' all over the internet or invite people to watch us masturbate all over our webcams. What the fuck (exactly) is the matter with us???? ARE were really that desperate? And what ARE we gonna do in those shoes.

I hope you all realise as I write this that I am laughing my ass off....mainly cause otherwise it's so pathetic I should be crying.

What I did on the site was apparently 'avant guarde' by stating that I was not interested in getting pictures of men's anatomy unless 'that's the ONLY picture you have, and I sure hope not'. Further, I stated that the biggest 'sex organ' in the body is not located below the waist.

I must have rattled some cages, because I received more than 60 responses. Of course most of them I was not interested in in the least. But who knows...perhaps there's a diamond in the rough out there. It's still all rather fascinating - what with the death threats and all I kind of feel like 'Secret Agent Man(Woman)' should be playing in the background....

*wink*

^_^

'Perverse' cannibal killer gets life

'Perverse' cannibal killer gets life

And his quote is priceless:

'I wanted to eat him -- I didn't want to kill him'

Can someone explain how you can eat ANYTHING without killing it?

And instead of giving him life - how about we just well...EAT HIM? Punishment fitting the crime and all and we according to him would not be wanting to kill him but we'd be satisfying that 'hunger' in a way a plain ole' Micky D's just doesn't....

*smirk*

Neglect

*brushes away the cobwebs*

Yes I have LOTS to write about - but I am leaving to go to dinner with my friend that is getting married next weekend - and of course my ex will be there (they knew each other in college) - and it promises to be uncomfortable (on top of the typical 'I hate weddings now' feeling that accompanies me at these events)...

But more to blog - later - hopefully tonight - definitely tomorrow.

A good time is guaranteed for all.

^_^

I had too much to 'dream' last night

Actually I've too much to 'blog' not enough time.....

Lots to tell - some really interesting stuff...and it's 2AM and I NEED TO SLEEP DAMBIT...

So for now...just a taste, literally.

Went to a really neat wine bar on Friday evening...met a wonderful couple who run the place and the gentleman who was the 'owner' was sexy, unassuming and gracious - hmmm exactly what I am looking for in a man....wonder if he's taken.

It's called 'Budapest Blonde' and it's located over off of Rockside Road in Independence, OH and I had a really nice glass of wine and learned a lot more about wine in general. (Goddess he was cute but I really think he's taken - ah well).

Check it out:





*******************

Perhaps one of these days I will keep notes about the things I want to really write about...

Oh and off the subject, but has ANYONE figured out how to do that thingy with the posts so they are not so long???? Help?

OK...

Kedves egeszsegere. (it's a Hungarian wine toast - no idea what it means)

^_^

Night

Save Lewis the Cat

http://myspace.com/lewisthecrazycat

..yep, let's get behind a cause we can actually win...

the heck with those people in Darfur.

*smirk*

A miracle I tell you!

Tonight, I had my Thursday night Yoga class that included the lady on oxygen (come to find out on top of recent thoracic surgery, she had COPD - serious stuff indeed)....

Lo and behold after talking to her about how important it was I get a note from her physician,
this evening, she showed up armed with a prescription from her own doctor (cardiologist) FOR YOGA! An Rx for YOGA!

*big grin*

I think I am going to have it bronzed. I also think I am going to call the doctor tomorrow and thank him for his vote of confidence - he told her he thought it was wonderful what she was doing.

woo-hoo!

Vatican Excommunicates 4 Chinese Bishops

Vatican Excommunicates 4 Chinese Bishops

The Pope was 'saddened' by the ordinations???

Ya know - you would think that the Catholics getting a foothold in Communist China would be a coup....

Guess not...bummer.

"The smell of rain...

...reminds me of the colour of your eyes."

He once said that to me.

(*smirk* I get a sort of weird kick out of making you guys wonder which 'he' I am referring to).

It's raining, now just sprinkling, the smell is everywhere, along with that 'neon' green-ness that is the hallmark of spring.

I am just hunkering down to write.

Nice. Breathe. In and Out. And flow with it...

NPR : Reggae Legends Toots and the Maytals in Concert

NPR : Reggae Legends Toots and the Maytals in Concert


...yeah listened to this last night while writing the 2nd part of the carnival chronicles...it was really jammin' (seriously!)...

Isn't the internet at times an amazing tool?

(That is as long as you aren't caught in one of those stings by those Dateline, NBC people).

roryshock: while senators called for abolition of fema

roryshock: while senators called for abolition of fema and creation of a bureaucracy with a different name there has been an agency coup: FEMA has been abolished

Please go check out Mr. Shock

RIGHT NOW!

(you'll be glad you did).

^_^

Mundane tasks and request for help

...so at any rate I realise that not all of you out there want to read my posts when they are 'really' long - I mean it's not like I am the next great American novelist or something....

I have tried 3 times now (unsucessfully) to 'shorten' the posts and allow you to be able to click somewhere if you ARE interested in reading my more verbose postings; but it's just not working.

So does anyone have a clue as to how I am suppose to do this? I followed all the instructions per 'Blogger' but I can't get it to work right....

Any help is always greatly appreciated.

And this is all in anticipation of putting down part II of the 'Carnivale Chronicles'

^_^

Merci beaucoup!